Stronger: a family strengthening toolkit

So just what is a family strengthening kit? In this video Robyn looks at just this question. And we explain a little about how the team at Arise Family built these kits.

With your workbook in hand, it’s time to start exploring the 5 pillars each Family Strengthening Kit is built on and the research that shows why these are important parts of building resilience in your family.

Our Family Strengthening Kits empower families in 5 different ways:

• To deepen relationships

• Nurture strengths in each other

• Grow problem solving skills

• Build resilience

• And develop a sense of belonging within the family.

This video also helps you see the 5 categories of activities that are part of your Family Strengthening Kit. These 5 areas are covered in more detail in each of the remaining modules. They are:

• Family Time

• Coping with big feelings

• How to have hard conversations

• Encouraging learning in the home

• Managing challenging behaviour

Let’s get stuck into to the contents of the kit! In this video Robyn looks at exactly what you will need to build your Family Strengthening Kit in each of the 5 categories and the general resources we use in several activities. But this list is by no means exhaustive and as you learn more about the why behind each category, we encourage you to adapt and add in activities that will suit your family and help you meet your goals.

So now that we know what to put in our kits, it’s time to take action! Before you continue with the course, we want to give you some homework. Take the list we have provided and put together your own DIY Family Strengthening Kit. You will find a copy of the resource’s checklist below the video for you to print off and use to do your shopping. We also provide you with a downloadable workbook to help you remember everything we discuss in this course.

In this module Kaylin will take you through the importance of family time and give you some ideas of how to start making this more of a practice in your own home.

Family time is a way to connect with each other, get to know each other, and a time to grow that bond between each other. It is a time for us to talk and listen to one another, instil family values and best of all, enjoy each other's company! In this video Kaylin explains the importance of family time and why we included it as an integral part of the Stronger Family Strengthening Kit.

Family time will look different depending on the age of your kids and interests of your family. In the kit, we’ve added some broad categories including different games you can play, movement activities and even singing. Kaylin also encourages spending time together in special ways such as meals or movies or books. Watch this video and make a list of different activities you would like to try in your next family time together. Your workbook will include a helpful infographic to remind you about the suggestions in your Stronger kit.

It’s never easy talking about our feelings but it’s an important skill for our kids to learn. In this module Kaylin discusses why we as parents need to role model talking about feelings with our kids and provides several activities from the kit that can help you on your way.

A big part of coping with big feelings is all about helping our children emotionally regulate. And much of this is done together – co-regulation. In this video Kaylin talks about co-regulation and the need for parents to teach their kids coping skills for feelings.

So, understanding the why behind talking to kids about feelings is important, but just how do we talk talk about feelings with little kids? Kaylin takes you through several easy to do activities using the contents of your Stronger kit to help you teach your kids about feelings, how to express them and to calm down when they need to. We’ve also included two downloads of pages you will need to complete one of the activities – your coping jar. And your workbook includes a simple infographic worksheet if you need a few reminders of what to do in the moment. Many of these activities work for parents too! Let us know how you get on...

In this module, Nicolette looks at encouraging learning in the home and why it was included as one of the central categories of the Stronger Family Strengthening Kit. She will also explain each of the activities that form part of this category, how to play them and the items you will need. Hopefully this will inspire you as you encourage learning in your home.

We all want our children to do well at school but this can be hard. We are not always sure what to do or how to support our kids. And yet, we know how vitally important education is. To help, Nicolette covers 5 important tips for how you can start to encourage learning at home. These are:

• Have a set time and place for homework

• Ensure good lighting and with no noise

• Sit with your child to do their work

• Read with your child

• Communicate with the teacher

We can encourage learning at home by using everyday activities to foster a love for learning. Included in the kit are ideas which you can use to make learning interactive and fun by using a few household items. This covers Maths, Literacy and Science activities.

Your workbook has a few pages that cover all of this content and provides an easy reference guide of all the activities discussed. These are just a few ideas of ways to encourage learning at home. But the possible list is endless. We encourage you to look at the activities together with your family values and create your own activities that you can do together to help your children to learn in a fun and engaging way. We would love to hear what you get up to!

Just how do we take complex, multifaceted and even contentious issues and help our kids understand it on their level? We’re about to dive into the topic that was really the catalyst for designing the Family Strengthening Kit. In this module, Robyn will look at 8 important points to remember as we learn how to have hard conversations with our children. Then we will look at some specific activities you can do using the contents of your kit that will help put these 8 points into place in your family.

As parents, we take on talking to our kids about hard topics because addressing these topics helps our kids feel safer. It can strengthen your connection with your child and helps to teach them about the world from a place of relationship. Having hard and honest conversations with your kids and helping them learn the process of critical thinking equips them with the tools they need to go and make this world a better place.

As a reminder, here are the 8 things to remember when you are trying to initiate a conversation with your child:

• Pick a time when you have some time to talk properly and there is no time pressure.

• Address their feelings and your own.

• Break things down into simple terms that are age appropriate.

• Use a 3rd object – do an activity together to take the pressure off the conversation.

• Start by ask your child what they know about the topic you are addressing. Ask open ended questions.

• Share your values about the topic.

• Encourage dialogue – what would they do in a specific situation? What solutions do they see to the issue?

• Be honest and say so if you don’t know the answer to a question they have. Suggest that you can learn about it together.

So now that we have a better idea of how to have hard conversations, let’s take a look at the specific activities we have included in the Family Strengthening Kit to equip you and your family.

You will find a summary of these points as well as an explanation of the activities in the pages of your Stronger workbook. These are of course only some ideas of how to start having hard conversations with your kids. But you know your kids best, so as always, we encourage you to adapt and add to these suggestions in ways that make your family stronger.

Being a parent is no easy task! This is made more difficult when our children display more difficult and defiant behaviour. In this module Danielle looks at managing challenging behaviour and why it was important to include in the Stronger Family Strengthening Kit. We will also explain each of the activities that form part of this category, how to play them and the items you will need.

There are things we can do to help us cope better when our children display challenging behaviour. In this video, Danielle talks about 3 steps we can take:

• Growing our own self-awareness about our triggers and learning to self-regulate or calm down.

• Connecting with our child before we correct them.

• Consistently coaching our kids instead of trying to control them. If we want to see change in children's behaviour, we need to be consistent, set appropriate limits and boundaries, validate feelings and strengthen our communication with our children.

By consistently spending family time with you child, helping them with their feelings, talking with them and being involved in their lives - you will see improvement in your child's behaviour.

Managing challenging behaviour is easier when you apply the 3 steps already discussed. But having a few activities and ideas in your back pocket helps too. In this video, Danielle discusses a few ideas of how to use the Family Strengthening Kit contents to manage challenging behaviour, as well as how to use activities from a few of the other modules to help you connect, empathize and calm down.

To help remind you of all of 6 steps you can take as you try to manage your child’s challenging behaviour, we’ve included a fridge cheatsheet in your workbook, and a copy for you to download below. You will see that most of these tips are really things you need to do as a parent to be able to help your child learn how to manage their own behaviour and emotions.

Your Stronger workbook also includes a section on managing challenging behaviour with an infographic explaining some of the activities. These should all provide a good starting point for you and your family.

If you’re still with us, you’ve made your way through the course, have built your Family Strengthening Kit and know how to use its contents to tackle each of the five categories on your journey to strengthening your own family.

• You’ve discovered why family time is so important and have several ideas for activities to use as you foster a sense of belonging and build connectedness in your family.

• You have learnt numerous ways to strengthen your children’s emotional vocabulary and have ideas on how to help them cope with their big feelings.

• You know how to role model healthy emotional expression and support your children’s resilience development.

• You have learnt ways to support your child’s education through simple activities in the home, doing everyday activities.

• You have learnt about ways to manage difficult behaviour when it happens in ways that are consistent and connection-focused.

• And you should feel more equipped to have hard conversations, with ideas of practical tools to use to talk with your child and have them open up to you more.

All of this should see you well on your way to seeing your family thrive! We encourage you to continue to add to your kit and we would love to hear what you do with this, so do send us an email with your ideas and experiences.

Below you will find our Recommended Parenting Booklist. This includes various books that go into more detail about connected and gentle parenting and the categories and concepts we have covered in this course. Enjoy!