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Learn MoreAnti-bullying Guide for Kids
Rating: 4.4 out of 54.4(47 ratings)
1,703 students
Anti-bullying Guide for Kids
Bully-Busting Techniques for Children with Jack and Kiki
Created byFrancesca Hepton
Last updated 4/2021
English
What you'll learn
- How to deal with bullying at school
- Practical tips on dealing with bullies
- The importance of and how to teach the Life Skill of respect and self respect to young children
- Understanding the power of forgiveness
- How to identify a bully
- Effective non-violent techniques for self-defence from the ancient laws of Martial Arts
- Increase self-awareness to get rid of bullies from your life
- 5 robust anti-bullying techniques
Course content
4 sections • 10 lectures • 29m total length
- A magic combination4:58
Bullying-prevention programs of this kind can help decrease bullying - in some cases by up to 25%
Make your children "bully smart". These following steps are preventive steps so you can be confident that your children can look out for themselves.
1. A clear definition of what bullying is by a 5-year-old child:
“Being nasty and unkind to someone every day.”
They understood the difference between bullying and physical harm, a clear distinction needs to be made.
2. In this course we'll be looking at verbal bullying at school, in clubs and in the playground.
We aim to provide helpful information that is easy to follow and implement.
We strive to be objective and encouraging in our delivery of powerful strategies children can adopt to prevent or as a minimum use to navigate their way around bullying without suffering from the adverse effects to their mental and emotional health.
The lessons learned can also be applied to the "virtual world", but here we get the children into a healthy and sound headspace so they are equipped to deal with any unwanted interventions from bullies.
We also equip them with tools for understanding the bully and making sure they in turn do not become the bully. The latter is often the case with victims of bullying as they try to redirect their hurt back to someone else.
We step in to make sure they do not internalise this hurt, but instead process it in a healthy way and deal with the situation openly.
To help deliver the effective techniques kids can apply in dealing with bullies, I am going to use the unusual but magical combination of: MARTIAL ARTS AND READING
Welcome everybody, not just bookworms, and fans of martial arts. You may find this an unusual combination: reading and a school of learning traditionally associated with combat. However, it transpires that people are not fully aware of just how much Martial Arts can offer, despite all the Karate Kid movies. Perhaps more importantly the general public does not know MA advocates seeks first and foremost to avoid conflict and violence.
WHAT READING AND MARTIAL ARTS HAVE IN COMMON
We all know that reading a good book has a positive psychological impact on children, especially if it’s done on a regular basis. The whole process improves their ability to concentrate, feeds their imagination, stimulates thought, helps them develop an independent thought process, deepens their need and thirst for knowledge. In much the same way, the training required in Martial Arts reinforces the importance of being disciplined and focused. Most children excel when they have a goal to reach. Once they learn this new skill or technique, they feel a sense of accomplishment, feeding that yearning to learn more, to develop.
FRIGHTENING STATISTICS WE CAN’T IGNORE
A fifth of young people in the UK and USA have been bullied in the past 12 months (2019). There is a download with more information.
Three out of four people who were bullied said it affected their mental health and nearly half became depressed as a result.
The statistics concerning the state of our children’s health in the UK is alarming. With waiting lists stretching over 10 months for 8-year-old with mental health issues, surely the alarm bells must be ringing in everyone’s ears.
HOW THIS COMBO CAN HELP FIGHT THE MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES RESULTING FROM BULLYING
The magical combination of reading and Martial Arts goes even further in a child’s personal development. Both practices improve children’s ability to concentrate on a task and their endurance as they see it through to its completion. Perhaps the biggest benefit is their boost in self-confidence:
from gaining new skills and knowledge
being part of a positive and engaging story
feeling empowered and inspired
being a part of something
Start incorporating these two activities in your child’s life today. Kiki's and Jack's stories can help lift your children’s spirits and sense of worth. Plus they are a hoot to read!
- Jack's Roar3:31
Jack helps deliver practical tips:
AVOID situations by walking away
BLOCK the bully by asking for help
DIVERT the situation by laughing
EVADE stand tall, be confident
FIGHT BACK by using a loud voice and powerful language.
SEE HOW HIS MANE GETS BIGGER THE MORE CONFIDENT HE BECOMES THROUGHOUT THE BOOK
These are beautifully illustrated in the children’s book Jack’s Roar, commissioned by Master Hudson and written by author Francesca Hepton.
These 5 levels of Bully-Busting Defence are a non-violent strategy based on the laws and rules of Martial Arts, which has as its aim: “To be the best version of yourself”
Although you can download the inside pages of the book and follow the story in the video, get the paperback copy of the book for your child to enjoy. Children sit for hours looking at the brightly coloured images, memorising the rhyming story and practising their ROAR.
Proceeds go to the Anti-bully Alliance and you can support the author by leaving a favourable review.
VISIT: amazon.com/author/hepton
Thank you
- Kiki the Kung Fu Kitten5:08
A beautiful story of friendship and the power of self-belief. Kiki, a little stray kitten, uses her own amazing powers to fend off a big bully and turn him into a great new friend.
Through fun rhymes and colourful pictures Kiki shows how understanding and self-belief can conquer all fears.
STORY
Kiki starts off as a timid little stray kitten.
Her new home is with the bully cat Banjo.
He is annoyed with her. Instead of talking about it, he takes out his frustrations on her by chasing her and scaring her.
But Kiki does not react. She just keeps being herself.
Eventually he pushes too far and Kiki uses the "Battle cry" technique.
HER HEADBAND IS A METAPHOR FOR HER SELF-BELIEF
She puts on her headband - a metaphor for her inner power stemming from self-confidence - and startles Banjo into a stunned daze.He is sorry for his appalling behaviour after he hears what really kind words Kiki has to say.
He is ashamed.
They decide to be friends instead, which Banjo actually prefers than being on his own as it makes him an even better person - keep fit and sharing.
This story explores both why someone may be showing bullyish behaviour and how they are in need of saving as much of not more than the victim of their bullying.
It shows just how far understanding, empathy and forgiveness can go. More powerful tools as a bully only wants to be noticed.
And how friendship is so much more rewarding in the end.
- There is a narrated video for download or please visit amazon for a paperback or e-book copy of the book Also available as an audio on audible. All very useful for children to interact with the characters and strengthen their bond with this important message.
- Avoid the bully0:42
Step 1. Avoid the bully.
In Martial Arts you would stay out of their way. Not engage in a fight.
It's always the best policy, try to avoid a fight whenever possible. How do you apply this to a bullying situation?
When applied to bullying situations, this is the first level of defence. If you avoid the confrontational situation it won't happen. This means you won't get hurt and the bully won't get his/her fun.How
IF YOU ARE ALONE
1. Avoid troublesome areas where you know the bully will be. If you are walking alone, keep to areas that are well lit, have lots of people around - DON'T take shortcuts and end up somewhere on your own.
2. DON'T wear headphones so the bully can't creep up on you. If you wear headphones you are blocking your senses. You need to be aware of your surroundings. This is a good habit to get into for your personal protection throughout life.
3. If you do actually come face to face with the bully, the way the avoid technique applies is to IGNORE them. Do not react to anything they say or do. Keep on walking to wherever you are going. They will soon get bored. And if you have followed Point 1 above they will not be able to pursue any line of physical abuse.
4. Refer to Jack's Roar to help your children understand this important technique: Act like you don't care, do not respond to the insults, stay away from confrontation.
But when he arrived who did he see?
That horrible lot with Baddy Marie.
“Call that a mane, it’s not even hair!”
Jack tried to act like he just didn’t care.
But Baddy Marie was far from done
She carried on teasing and poking fun.
The laughter was loud, like donkeys braying
So Jack focused on what the teacher was saying.
Soon Baddy Marie got bored of her games
And stopped teasing and calling him names.
- Block the bully1:06
Step 2. Block the bully.
If you were unable to avoid the danger and your opponent tries to attack you, in Martial Arts you would raise your arm or leg to block the kick or punch from your opponent.
Let's see how this technique translates as a practical move for dealing with bullies.
If danger is coming your way, just like the kick or punch explained above, but in bullying it may also be verbal abuse, for example, you can block it so it doesn't have any impact.
1. If you're at school, go tell a teacher, at play tell the club supervisor. This stops the bully from being able to deliver any more abuse.
2. Take their fun away. Be consistent.
Getting someone else to help and intervene. This may annoy the bully especially if you do it consistently, but they will soon give up because they are not getting their way.
Remember to use this in conjunction with Step 1. Avoid the bully.
3. Refer to Jack's Roar to help your children understand this important technique of asking the teacher to intervene:
Things got worse when he went out to play.
“Buzz off,” said Mean Mike, “You cannot stay.”
Jack told the teacher that Mike wouldn’t share.
“Now remember Mike, you have to be fair.”
Mike said “sorry”, and at first he was mad,
But when Jack played, he was actually glad.
He stopped being mean, stopped being horrible,
It was much more fun, even enjoyable.
- Divert the bully1:29
Step 3. Divert the danger
In Martial Arts, if you could not avoid a fight and you blocked the punch or kick, you would proceed with Step 3 the next time to push your opponent away. Deflecting a blow by blocking it and move it away further drives home the point that you are not interested in fighting. You still haven't thrown a punch. Please note this. Martial Arts is primarily a non-violent way of living life. You exhaust all peaceful options before engaging in anything physical.
To deflect or divert a bully that persists on teasing you even after being told not to by the teacher, you can:
1. Do something that surprises them. If they say you have funny hair, you could agree and say yes, you have a real "bed head" look or if they say you're short, you could retaliate with the fact that it's warmer closer to the ground and ask them how the weather is up there. This will distract them and show that their words do not hurt you.
2. Laugh with them if they are laughing at you. Just say how nice it is to be happy and have a good laugh.
3. Refer to Jack's Roar to help your children understand this important technique of doing something the bully does not expect, like laughing. It really takes the wind out of their sails:
Down at the pool Jack was ready to swim
When Nasty Nick started laughing at him.
“Nice shorts! Did you get them for free?”
You look totally weird, like a giant green pea!”
When the other boys started laughing too
Jack knew there was only one thing to do.
He laughed as well, “You’re right about that!”
They all stopped, completely taken aback.
- Evade the bully1:34
Step 4. Evade the bully.
If the person the bully wants to attack looks confident and calm, it makes them think twice about teasing them.
Being imposing through your posture and confidence is a great tactic used in Martial Arts to deter potential opponents. It weakens them because they are filled with worry and fear instead of being assured and aggressive.
The same applies to bullies. When they approach:
1. Be calm, confident and assertive. Note to parents/carer/educator: be a role model for this. Children at a young age copy what they see. And they see you a lot! Give them a good role model to follow. Stand tall and walk with confidence so that they will. When they are in a confrontational situation, we don't want them to show any fear. This is a sign the bully is winning. If they follow Step 1 above and make sure they are not caught alone, they can keep on walking with confidence. It sends a very clear message
2. Look strong even if you don't feel it. Remember to remind children that the bully is just a person too. They are scared and hurt on the inside, so if you act strong, this will worry them, and they may think twice about harassing you again.
3. Refer to Jack's Roar to help your children understand this important technique of standing tall, shoulders back and keeping eye contact:
Out on the field, Jack was playing ball
When up came Thud looking very tall.
“Give me your ball you little squirt,
Do it now or soon you’ll get hurt.”
He pushed little Jack down to the ground
No one else saw, no one else was around.
Jack stood up tall, looked him straight in the eye.
Thud quivered, as if he were going to cry.
- The modern battle cry1:57
Don't worry, there is no physical violence. This "attack" is in the form of shouting. Your voice is a strong "weapon". Let's use it.
There are lots of examples of where the voice is used to scare others away in battle:
"Confederate soldiers in the American Civil War developed a uniquely terrifying battle cry to intimidate their enemy and boost their own morale."
"...hundreds of warriors would use specific whistles while riding into war, as a weapon of psychological warfare, scaring their enemies and lowering their morale."
"According to historians, ancient Roman soldiers have several battle cries designed to intimidate their opponents."
You could try it out in class or at home with your child to get them prepared, bolster their confidence and feel the power of their voice:
FIRE!!!
or maybe some real ones for fun!
Currahee – U.S. Army 506th Parachute Infantry Regiment, 101st Airborne
Remember the Alamo - Battle of the Alamo, Texas Revolution
Uurah! – Soviet Union
Deseperta Ferro! – Almogavars (Catholic Spain)
Tenno Heika Banzai – Japan
Alala/Eleleu - Ancient Greeks
Barritus - Ancient Romans
The voice has the power to move people into a different state of mind. Teach your child how to ward off a bully with his/her voice.
1. It's important to remember: The bully is the one with the problem, not you. So even though you may be inferior in size, you are not inferior in self-confidence. Stand tall, look them in the eye and scream at the top of your lungs. Not just crying but a loud scream as though there was a fire, in fact many suggest shouting FIRE to catch people's attention.
2. Your screaming will draw the attention of people around you. This will put a stop to the bullying
It may feel awkward at first, but that's why you practise and reassure them that it is the right thing to do if they are in danger.
3. Refer to Jack's Roar to help your children understand this important technique of "roaring" at your bully:
But the trouble was far from done
And before Jack could even run,
Up came Evil Ellie, the Queen of mean,
The nastiest cat you've ever seen.
“Hey!” she shouted. “You over there.”
She ran at Jack and leapt through the air.
Jack didn’t move as he watched Ellie soar.
He puffed out his chest and let out a great ROAR.
A shocked Evil Ellie landed with a splat
Then she ran away like a real scaredy-cat.
- Stand tall6:40
Here is a little more information on the principles of natural laws that may be able to help your child better understand the significance of image.
There are lots of natural laws out there like if an animal is red, spikey or black and yellow they are dangerous or poisonous. And the Law of Attraction is one of these natural laws. When an animal roars or hisses, it most likely means they are cross - and you should run!!
We judge people by the way they look before we get to know them, just like when you pick up a book and look at the front cover first. If it has pictures on it and is bright, it is most likely fun or for children. If it is dull in colour and very long, it is probably for adults and quite in depth. In much the same way, we all wear signs or book covers that tell others what we are like - we may not be aware that we are doing it, but we all are. If you look at Jack in the story Jack's Roar, you can see on a couple of occasions his toes are turned inwards. This is a sign of insecurity, being introverted, not feeling confident. He is giving off a sign.
This section helps children explore what signs they are giving off. It also gives them ways in which to give off a more confident air to deter bullies in the first place.
1. Image is everything.
In a world of marketing, social media and a society driven by visuals more than ever, it is important to send out the right signals. Goes hand-in-hand with Step 4: Evade. You are giving off signals that you are not to be messed with. You are not an easy target. Bullies are scared too - maybe even moreso, that is why they pick on people who are on their own or look weak.
The way you treat yourself is the blueprint for how others treat you.
For example: if you dress with pride, walk tall and act with confidence, people are likely to treat you with respect.
On the other hand, if you are scruffy, looking down at your shoes and mumbling, people are not really going to be drawn to you as a someone of strength - no matter what great thoughts you may have inside. On the outside you're screaming "I'm nobody important" because you don't even take the time to look smart, and so that is how others will treat you.
2. What kind of animal are you?
When you think of a mouse do you think big and brave or shy and timid?
When you think of a lion do you think big and brave or shy and timid?
Of course, we all see the mouse as shy and timid and the lion as big and brave. Why? Because of the way they look and act.
Download the fun exercises. These clearly demonstrates to children how your appearance tells other people who you are and how to treat you.
You can work with the children to find more examples in the books: Kiki the Kung Fu Kitten and Jack's Roar.
3. “Stand tall! Head up! Shoulders back! Good eye contact! Smile!”
At assemblies or the start of class, ask the children to stand up straight, push their shoulders back, have good eye contact, smile and share high-fives with the child next them whilst shouting: “You’re awesome!”
Since physical appearance is one of the main reasons bullies choose to bully a particular person, by creating an image of confidence, you are lowering your risk of being a target.
1. BE PROUD OF WHO YOU ARE
The best way of adopting a confident stance is by actually feeling confident about yourself. By exploring all the great things about yourself, you can start to feel proud of who you are and give off that air of "don't mess with me!"
The downloads provided help children explore and celebrate their uniqueness
2. HOW YOU FEEL IS EVERYTHING
Feelings drive our decisions and ultimately our actions.
Feelings and posture also determine how others treat us.
Goes hand-in-hand with Step 4: Evade
Downloads on how to change your mood with a bit of self-control and self-awareness
- Help me deliver more resources2:02
I hope you found the course useful.
I would like to make more resources available to schools and parents, please support me by buying my children's books
on amazon:
Jack's Roar
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Jacks-Roar-Francesca-Hepton/dp/1545246424/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1581686650&sr=8-5
Kiki the Kung-Fu Kitten
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Kiki-Kung-Kitten-Francesca-Hepton/dp/1546536515/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=
Or visit my author page to see all my books: amazon.com/author/hepton or get the AUDIO of Kiki the Kung Fu Kitten on audible
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Kiki-the-Kung-Fu-Kitten/dp/B07D2JGTSQ/ref=tmm_aud_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=
Or check out my A Positive Start - How to Raise Healthy Happy Kids course which is running FREE for a limited period of time on udemy
If you would like more information on how Martial Arts can help your child please contact Master James Hudson at: www.aimmartialarts.com
THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT
Francesca Hepton - an author trying to make a difference
Requirements
- Parent, carer or educator who wants to help stop bullying among children
- Anyone who wants a better understanding of why we bully
- Anyone who wants to learn effective techniques on how to manage and even stop being bullied
- An open mind to new ways of tackling bullying
Description
Explore robust effective ways to prevent bullying among young children. Last updated 8 April 2022
The magic combo: Martial Arts & Reading - a great way to learn and teach:
To help teachers and educators raise awareness and effectively change behaviour among young children, this course uses a variety of teaching methods:
1. The power of storytelling - using 2 picture books to instil values of courage, self-belief and respect in tackling bullies
2. Martial Arts strategies - 5 non-violent ways to deal with bullies at school or in the playground
3. Standing tall - take charge of your life, moving from victim to empowered
4. Importance of respect - learning the life skill of respect and self-respect
1. Storybooks
Fun rhyming picture books with characters the children can relate to.
Jack's Roar
Jack may be small but he has a mighty ROAR. Follow Jack and cheer him on as he not only defeats the bullies, but opens their eyes to a new way of thinking and being. Help your child find their roar!
Kiki the Kung Fu Kitten
A shy little kitten faces the challenge of living with bully-baddie Banjo. Using her powers of compassion, understanding and self-belief she teaches him a lesson or two in the ways of empathy and friendship. Let Kiki empower your child to believe in themselves and help take the bite out of bullies.
2. The "bully-busting" program for kids provides 5 proven self-defence techniques kids can use at school or in the playground:
Non-violent techniques based on the ancient laws of Martial Arts. System devised by Master James Hudson, Owner of AIM Martial Arts & Leadership Academy.
2.1 Avoid
2.2 Block
2.3 Divert
2.4 Evade
2.5 Battle cry
3. How do you show up?
The importance of owning who you are. How you appear to others may be making you an easy target. Help your child stand tall and use the powerful Law of Attraction to ease bullies out of their life for good.
4. Respect
Learning life skills at a young age is essential. One of the most important ones is that of Respect - both for others and yourself. Follow a simple reward system to help your child adopt the mindset of Respect and all its benefits (other Life Skills, see A Positive Start)
Who this course is for:
- Parents and educators interested in stamping out bullying in the lives of young children
- Educators and parents who would like to help a child who is being bullied