Do you sometimes feel nervous in social encounters?
Would you like to appear more relaxed and confident in important job interviews?
Do you often have doubts about whether what you do is right or wrong?
Would you like to get rid of this crazy feeling in your stomach that prevents you from doing what you really want to do?
If you answered "yes" to one of those questions, this course if for you.
Why Meditation for Confidence?
Honestly, I believe there is a huge misunderstanding about meditation. Many people think it only contains of sitting in a room all by yourself for hours doing nothing. Well, this can be a way of Meditation, however in this course I will present you with something more effective.
We will discuss ways in order to bring that present state of meditation from the quiet room into your dynamic world. It is one thing to be happy and relaxed in your room at home, but a totally different thing to bring this feeling to your work place, or to a bar or club.
What is Confidence really?
Confidence is in its core nothing else than pure self-trust. This self trust means getting rid of any doubts about whether you will succeed or not. It means trusting in whatever happens that you ARE OKEY and WILL ALWAYS BE OKEY. You see, this is where the Meditation Techniques in this course come in.
Why am I qualified to teach you?
For the last 6 years I experimented with active and passive forms of meditation. I have gained over 1000+ hours of meditation experience, while at the same time running my own webdesign business and getting my Masters degree at University.
You see, I think there are two aspects to life: the YIN and the YANG, the ACTIVE and the PASSIVE, the RELAXING and the TAKING ACTION. This course is all about melting those two togethers, so that you can be RELAXED WHILE TAKING ACTION.
The course is structured in 3 main parts:
1- Why is the "old way" of looking at confidence flawed and counterproductive? What do I mean by "natural confidence"?
2 - What different kinds of attention do we have? How can we access all aspects of our Personality?
3- Hands On: What are practicable and simple meditation practicies to incoorporate in your daily life?
All in all the course takes only around 1.5 hours, but the real fun starts after the course in real life, believe me, it is going to be a BIG ADVENTURE!
I am looking forward to work with you,
For a start we look at the mindset behind this whole course. The spirit behind it is, that we can develope a sense of self-trust through meditation. Meditation allows you to see yourself not AGAINST the world, but rather WITH the world. "The universe is my classroom" becomes the new mantra.
This simple 30 Second powerful is a great way to start this course.
Every so often our teachers, friends or family tell us on how we should change, improve, get better and so on. There is nothing wrong with having goals and trying to improve. However, there is also a time when we can let go of all these ideas about being different than what / who we are right now.
Honestly, the more you think about Confidence, the less confident you will be. I know this sounds weird. But there is a certain truth to it.
I realized that in the moments of my life where I had been the most confident and self-secure were moments where I acutally DID NOT CARE ABOUT BEING CONFIDENT.
This is really funny, because the moment we no longer care is the moment our minds actually STOP to mess with us.
If you don't care about confidence
So why did I still make this course then, if thinking about confidence cann be counter productive?
The reason for it is that there is a different way of talking about confidence: Namely a "Natural" way: Natural Self-Confidence means Self-Trusting and believing in the process of life.
What are the different ways of building up confidence? We could look at the "Outer Game" of confidence (bodylanguage, voice, eye contact, hand gestures) and work on these. However, this course focuses on the "Inner Game" of Self-Confidence (Inner Balance, self trust, relaxation and mindsets).
Bodylanguage, voice, facial expression and words can be one way of talking about confidence. However, if all these "outer game" aspects stem from an "inner game" attitude, what does this kind of "natural confidence" really look and feel like?
In this short segmet I talk about what Natural Confidence could mean, and how it can look like in real life.
One of the main problems of the self-help industry is, that they create these "ideal image" of how you should be. For example, they say that attractive men are confident, self-secure and do not have fears.
Now, what happens if a man experiences anxiety or nervousness around women is that he feels guilty for feeling nervous, "because attractive man are not nervous around women". All these stupid ideas of how we "should" be have been taught by many teachers. In this video
It is indeed quite hard not to fall into the "This is what you should do and how you should be" trap of the self help industry. I guess even here in this course I fell into this trap. However, it is important to recognize these teachings in order to deal with them in the right way.
Do you know the saying that "what you resist persists"? When a cat jumps off a tree, it relaxes its four feet in order to land with a soft thub. The cat has full trust, that by relaxing it will minimize the force on the impact. We as human beings oftentimes create a lot of pressure and anxiety by over-thinking such situations. By tensing up instead of relaxing, we often times get hurt more than it was needed.
Relaxation does not mean passivity or being limp and soft. Rather it comes from a sense of trust in the process of life. It's the kind of relaxation you see when a Tiger is spying for his prey.
For rounding up the first part of this course, try these three simple exercises.
The first one helps you to be aware of your mindset.
The second one is helpful if you are new to meditation.
The third one is for remembering yourself, that you already have the capacity to be confident, it just depends on the situation or activity.
If you manage to get some of these questions right, you are equipped with the necessary foundation to get the most out of this course.
What does focus and attention have to do with confidence? In this video we look at two different kinds of attention: narrow focues (stressful, spotlight attention) and body focus (broad, floodlight attention).
Japanese sword masters understood the principle behind being grounded and relaxed a long time ago. In this segment you will hear a little anecdote that illustrates this idea.
WARNING: Recently I was reading more about the Zen culture and history. It indeed should not be forgotten that there was a lot of blood shed in all those wars over in Japan and China. So, spiritual philosophical schools have not at all be connected with pacificm, peace and non-violence. This should be kept in mind when we talk about these culture from the east.
Based upon the book "The Open Focused Brain" we look at what can happen in the brain in terms of electric activity when we shift from narrow focus to open focus.
The distinction between conscious/subconscious creates a lot of confusion. Many people only identify with their conscious thinking side. But what about the subconscious? Who is growing your hair? Who is digesting your food in the stomach?
So, what was this section all about? If you answer only ONE of these questions correctly, you are well prepared for the next section.
For a start, experiment with these three simple techniques to ground yourself in the present moment. (WARNING: The last one will probably shock you)
Here they are: (you can also download the PDF and print them out=
These are 3 simple techniques you can use especially during stressful situations to ground yourself more in the present moment.
1| Listening to Silence: Try to hear the sound of one of the corners in the room. Just look at a place in the room where there is no sound, and try to listen to this silence.
2| Eye Roles: Close your eyes and when breathing out, role your eyes slightly upwards. This reduces your thought activity immediately.
3| Crazy Visualization: Whenever you are interacting with another person, try to visualize their intestines and their organs inside their body. Imagine their stomach digesting food, their lungs filled with air, their heart pumping blood, and even their genitals hanging loose.
I know this sounds creepy, but it really works. Try it! Why does it work?
Because oftentimes when we are anxious, we are too much absorbed with thinking, we see people only in their “role” or “image” (for example “He’s my boss” or “She is hot”). This little visualization allows you to realize that the person in front of you is a human being made out of flesh and bones just like you. This allows you to relax more around people.
It took me THREE YEARS to learn this lesson. Once this idea was clear, everything became easy.
The main points is this: Meditation is FUN, if you make it HARD WORK and SERIOUS you can spoil it.
The more we talk about meditation, the more we can actually spoil it. Why is this so? Techniques are oftentimes located in the active mind and in the conscious side. Meditation however, is a way of letting the full body develope it's awareness.
Indeed, there are helpful techniques for breathing, posture and focusing on specific chakras or body parts. However, I found that if we focus on TECHNIQUES instead of BEING WHAT IS we miss the point of true meditation.
"How long should I meditate?"
"Shall I use an alarm?"
In this segment we look at TIME. The application mentioned in the video is called "Zazen Meditation Timer"
For this Mini-Meditation you need a quiet place to sit upright, or if you prefere, to lie down. The meditation shows you a specifice technique of how to reach a more "Open Focused" state. This means that you focus not only on your thoughts, feelings and bodily sensations, but also on the space around you.
In this mini meditation you can learn a specific way of focus during meditation. I will invite you to "feel the space" around you. It may seems odd and impossible at first, but I promise that after some time of practice you will all of a sudden start to actually feel your surroundings in a much more sensitive way.
Tired of doing meditation inside? Try this simple way of walking meditation outside in nature. If you don't have forests or rivers nearby, city parks will also do.
What now? I invite you to cultivate a habit of at least 5-10 minute meditation every day. Why? Over time this creates a different perspective on life: one of "THE WORLD IS FOR ME" and not "THE WORLD IS AGAINST ME".
The ability to stay centred in hectic situations is one of the effects of this kind of practice and attitude towards life.
It was a real pleasure working with you. If you have any feedback / questions, these are my contact details. We can also skype.
Over the past 5 years I collected quotes that really inspired me and resonated with me. Here you find this collection summarized in a little 4 page text. Read it once and I guarantee you that a certain shift will take place inside yourself.
On archive.org there is a huge collection of FREE nature recordings in high quality. They can be really helpful during meditation or just for relaxation. (Link in the Document)
is focusing on research in Educational Psychology and Educational Philosophy.
Getting in contact with meditatonal practices in his early twenties, he slowly distilled the most useful techniques out of a nearly unlimited amount of teachings. Right now he works and lives in Switzerland.
Steven is engaged in projects concerning self-development and self-discovery. He enjoys a cold drink on warm summer evenings and is very fond of eating raw broccoli. When there is time at hand, he goes hiking in the swiss mountains.