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Time To Go: How To Safely Leave An Abusive Relationship

Name: Time To Go: How To Safely Leave An Abusive Relationship
Rating: 4.7 (53 reviews)

A Step by Step Guide On How To Safely And Successfully Leave An Abusive Relationship Quickly, Even If You Have No Money

Highest Rated

Created byDr Norva Semoy Abiona

Last updated 6/2023

English

What you'll learn

Understand the 10 major types of abuse and the many different methods. Yes, there is a difference in the two
Know the many different signs of abuse
Know the Factors leading to domestic abuse
Understand the impact of abuse on the victim, children and the family; including some statistics
Successfully leave an abusive relationship safely and with confidence
Have the knowledge and skills to successfully start their new life abuse free
Know 16 sources for where they can raise finance to leave
Know how to sever all ties with their abuser through legal separation or divorce
Be clear on who they should go to for support and who they should hold back from telling
Learn from the true stories of other victims and survivors
Wisely and Safely walk away from an abusive relationship

Course content

13 sections • 103 lectures • 5h 4m total length

Welcome To The Course1:38
Welcome to 'Time To Go' The Course
How This Course Can Help A Victim2:30
Action Steps:

A.

Have an open mind for learning; put aside the ‘I know that’ mindset and be willing to receive the knowledge and take action.

B.

Do all your online research through https://duckduckgo.com/ or in the ‘incognito’ mode offered by some browsers; instead of just using a search engine such as Google as it will track your searches.
Getting The Most Out Of This Course3:09
Action Steps:

If possible have a single note book for writing (try not to use loose pages as they can be easily misplaced)

Pen / pencil

A secure bag, container or location to put important things away safely as you accumulate items

Believe in yourself

Stick-to-itiveness through the course

Optimistic vision for your abuse-free future

Use the 'notes' section to the far right of this page to safely make your course notes online

I have allotted a couple hours on a Friday to answer messages and communicate with students.
Section Quiz

Your Starting Point!0:40
Your Relationship and Personal Potential Assessment
Course Introduction1:48
Course Outline

1. Introduction

2. Types Of Abuse In Relationships

3. Methods Of Abuse

4. Am I A Victim Of Abuse?

5. Its Time To Decide Your Next Move

6. Time To Go!

7. Financing Your Leaving, Even If You Have No Money

8. Settling Into Your New Life

9. What About Divorce?

10. Recap

11. Congratulations!

12. Bonus Material
Section Quiz

Types Of Abuse8:43
Action step

Make a list of the types of abuse you believe you are experiencing in your relationship.
Spotlight On Intimate Abuse1:50
Action step

Which of the following best describes your situation and why?

Intimate terrorism

Violent resistance

Situational couple violence

Mutual violent control
Spotlight On Combination Abuse3:11
Action steps

Have you experienced coercive control or spiritual abuse?

If yes, in a paragraph or two, journal about your experience of that type of abuse.
Factors Leading To Abuse In Relationships0:55
Action Steps

Write down two separate lists with factors leading to the abuse in your relationship:-

A.

What do you believe led to you becoming a victim of abuse?

B.

From your knowledge, what do you believe led to your partner to becoming an abusive spouse towards you?
Consequences Of Abuse3:38
Action steps

A.

Download the accompanying document and read through.

B.

Make a list of all the people and pets you feel are being affected by your abuser’s behaviour.

C.

If you feel up to it, journal a bit about what effects the abuse is having on each of them.
Section Quiz

The Difference Between Methods And Types Of Abuse1:40
Action steps

A.

Download and open the list on the methods of abuse.

Warning there are a lot, so take your time to sit with this as some people find it overwhelming at first.

B.

Take time out to journal, take a walk or sit with yourself as you go through the data.
Terrorize and Intimidate0:59
Action Step

Make a list of the methods of Terrorizing and Intimidation you have experienced in your relationship.
Control and Coercion0:48
Action step

Make a list of the methods of Control and Coercion you have experienced in your relationship.
Constant Monitoring or Checking Up0:48
Action step

Make a list of the methods of Constant Monitoring or Checking up that you have experienced in your relationship.
Isolate2:19
Action step

Make a list of the methods of Isolation you have experienced in your relationship.
Ignore or Rejection1:54
Action step

Make a list of the methods of Ignore Or Rejection that you have experienced in your relationship.
Corrupt1:16
Action step

Make a list of the methods of being Corrupted that you have experienced in your relationship.
Manipulate and Exploit0:48
Action step

Make a list of the methods of Manipulate and Exploit that you have experienced in your relationship.
Humiliation or Insult0:20
Action step

Make a list of the methods of Humiliation or Insult that you have experienced in your relationship.
Financial or Material Exploitation1:16
Action step

Make a list of the methods of Financial or Material Exploitation that you have experienced in your relationship.
Sexual Violation and Neglect2:27
Action step

Make a list of the methods of Sexual Violation and Neglect that you have experienced in your relationship.
Physical Violence1:04
Action step

Make a list of the methods of Physical Violence that you have experienced in your relationship.
Section Quiz

Am I A Victim0:49
Action step

Download the Signs of Abuse document and read the list.
Identifying The Signs Behind Abuse0:40
Action step

Go through the information again in more detail on the Signs of Abuse document and make a note of any that describes what you have experienced.
Acknowledging You’re In An Abusive Relationship0:43
Action step

Based on all that you have learnt so far, journal about the extent of your experience of abuse at the hand of your spouse.
Understanding Abuse2:02
Action step

Write a short letter to your former self, on the day you met your abuser or when you started having feelings for them. In the letter advise the younger you about what to look out for; specifically signs of your relationship becoming toxic/unhealthy.
The Foundations Of Abuse4:40
Action step

Reflect on the training and consider the different aspects of your character and life. Then do the same for your partner’s character and life. Can you work out what is by nature, nurture and choice?
The Perpetual Cycle0:50
Action step

If you are a parent can you see any red flags for how a perpetual cycle can develop in any of your children’s life?
Substance Abuse2:00
Action step

In your relationship, has substance abuse played any part in you or your abuser’s life? Consider the answer; remember that substances can be prescribed as well as illicitly obtained.
The Narcissist2:09
Action step

Do you believe that your abuser has any narcissist tendencies? Do some more research on the topic when it’s safe to do so.
Two True Stories Of Regular Women4:40
Action step

Do any of the stories resonate with you? Write a paragraph or two about those that stood out to you.
How Abusers Continue To Control And Abuse Their Victims9:52
Action step

Make a list of the reasons why you decided to stay in the relationship until now.
Intimate Slavery3:15
Action step

Reflecting on the concept of ‘Intimate Slavery’ how does it make you feel. Write a sentence or two about your experience and feelings.
The Effects Of The Abuser’s Attitude4:01
Action step

Where in your life and the life of others is your abuser’s behavior surprisingly more destructive than you had first realised?
The Different Effects Of Abuse1:53
Action Step
What are you most worried about in your relationship?
Once Upon A Time4:45
Action step

Do any of the stories resonate with you? If you are up to it send me a short story of an incident in your relationship that stands out to you.
Section Quiz

Deciding Wisely To Leave Your Abusive Relationship5:01
Action step

It’s time to start weighing up all the facts based on what you’ve been jotting down. Take the time to look at the notes you have taken and make an informed decision about what you do from now on.
Important Factors When Making The Decision0:59
Action Step

Take this time to consider if your partner’s behaviour is loving or selfish.
Decide When to Leave0:51
Action step

Look out for the manipulation as you look toward your abuse-free future.
Decide to Leave Later1:21
Action step

Look at and study material that will help you become more patient and level headed despite the negativity that will come your way from your spouse.
Decide to Leave Now1:51
Action step

Start making a short term plan if you need to leave quickly.
Beginning The Thinking And Planning Process2:47
Action step

Practice the mirror work suggested in this lecture.
Get A Couple of Cheerleaders1:20
Action steps

A.

Make a list of two to five people you can trust.

B.

Choose two or three of those people to be your cheerleaders.
Make Plans0:43
Action step

Start considering what your Plan A, Plan B and Plan C will look like.
The To Do List0:45
Action steps

Download the checklist; study it and begin to implement it.
Begin Looking For Work1:32
Action step

Begin to think of jobs or ways to get into business so you can start to generate your own income as soon as possible.
Learn From Others0:16
Action step

Read stories and look at videos of people who have successfully come out of an abusive relationship.
When Silence Protects0:36
Action step

Begin to practice how you will address awkward questions from loved ones. You can ask for suggestions and advice from others like your cheerleaders, domestic abuse hotline operators or a solicitor.
Plan What to Take With You0:55
Action steps

A.

Download the lists (they are both located in the same document).

B.

Make 2 lists of your own containing:

The things you must take.

The things you’d love to take with you.
Section Quiz

Leaving The Abusive Relationship1:00
Action step

Schedule a date and time in your calendar.
Ready, Set…0:57
Action step

Choose to share your plan with a cheerleader or someone in authority who you can trust to be honest with you. (Consider the police, doctor, an attorney, the leader of a shelter for victims and religious leader who is against spousal or any other types of abuse, etc)
Mentally prepare1:27
Action Step Choose some motivational music and motivational leaders to listen to as you continue to work through your to-do list.
Don’t Underestimate Your Abuser2:18
Action step

Continue to be mindful of the information that you share with your abuser. Do not underestimate what they can do in a fit of anger.
Leave in a safe manner1:14
Action steps

A.

Prepare for when you are leaving to keep safe. Call for support if you need to and try to leave when your spouse is not around. If you are on the central coast in the U.S. check out the California moving company Meathead Movers.

B.

If you believe that you’ll need a restraining order apply for one. If you are not sure get legal advice.
How Far Should You Go1:54
Action step

Where should you go? Choose from local, regional, another state or another country? Your decision will determine your level of planning and the finance you will need.
Leaving Behind Your Loved Ones1:12
Action step

Get the name and details of the people you want to keep in contact with. Remember, when you finally leave, you don’t have to share with everyone information about your new location.
What If You Or Your Family Owns The Home?1:30
Action step

Get a hold of any legal documents that will prove ownership of the house. Do not let that stop you from leaving if you are in fear for your life.
Once Upon A Time1:32
Action Step Reflect on the story and journal your feelings at this point in time.
Your Safety Is Paramount1:55
Action steps

Reflect on the information and journal your feelings at this time. Remember that you should not trust all that an abuser is saying; he or she will say anything to get their own way.
Section Quiz

Thinking Independently0:25
Action step

Journal about the reasons WHY you are leaving and need to raise the finance. This can be a matter of life and death so when you start approaching others for work or money and when you bring in the finances for your move remember the importance of it.
Some Victims Feel Trapped0:26
Action steps

Do you feel financially trapped in your relationship?

If yes, begin to think outside the box for creative ways to raise finance.
Breaking The Dependency0:26
Action step

Write a list of 5 ways you might be able to raise finance. As you continue through the course compare your list to what are suggested.
Breaking The Dependency Disclaimer0:32
Action step

Keep in mind that not all of the options are best for you - you may or may not need to use all or any of them.

I am not a financial advisor.
Introducing Ways To Fund Your Leaving10:05
Action steps

Which are the top three (3) options you would like to try.

If necessary, start researching your choices more, then begin to work on each one.
Your Financial Paper Trail0:50
Action steps

Decide where you are going to put your entire financial document. When researching online.

This is a reminder to do all your online research through https://duckduckgo.com/ or using an incognito window on your browser instead of using a search engine such as Google normally as it will track your searches.
Section Quiz

After You’ve Left0:38
Action step

Do remember to find a way to celebrate the big bold necessary step you have taken, when you leave.
Don’t - A Word Of Caution0:35
Action step

Put your documents and certificates in a place that is easily accessible for you.
Starting Over0:33
Action step

Begin to creatively think about how to get settled into your new life.
You May Not Realize0:24
Action step

Give yourself permission to grieve the old life and to come to terms with it. Remember that you have made a positive decision for your life.
Ensuring The Safety Of Your Children0:34
Action step

Pay close attention to the things your children are saying and doing as they adjust to this new normal.
Becoming Untraceable1:36
Action step

Go through the information in the section and follow the instructions to make you safe.
Understanding Stalking10:48
Action step

Keep your eyes and ears open for if you are being tracked and stalked by your abuser, be it directly or indirectly.
Beginning The Healing Process4:49
Action steps

Spend time on spiritual growth and guidance. Spend time in prayer and meditation.

Book a break, whether it’s at a friend’s house when your children are on school break or for a weekend. Consider some options and begin to plan one for within the next 3 months.
Focus On Personal Growth8:17
Action steps

Spend time on spiritual growth and guidance. Spend time in prayer and meditation.
Spend time on your personal development. Have a look at our website to see if any of our other courses are right for you http://www.thewisewife.com/. Equally there are lots of content on YouTube that are free to access if you are disciplined enough to work on your own. Choose a positive mantra / quote and repeat it to yourself on a regular basis.
Building Financial Security1:02
Action step

Continue to think of ways to add value and get paid for it. If you have to improve a specific skill write down the skill and research the best way to go about it.
Rebuilding Your Life0:40
Action step

Continue to repeat your mantra and journal how you would like your future to look like.
Leave The Past Behind0:48
Action step

Consider areas of your personal, social and financial life that are still connected to your ex and work on disconnecting them as soon as it is wise to do so.
Take Care Of Your Health0:57
Action step

Make a list of the things you enjoy doing, whether or not you had stopped; include activities you would like to try. Start a healthy activity and try new things.
You Are Allowed Treats0:32
Action step

Treat yourself to something you enjoy. Set a budget and stick to it. For example, having luxurious ice-cream is great if you are on a low budget; attending a theatre performance may be suitable if you can afford it.
Enjoy The New You2:27
Action step

Make a list of relationships you want to build. For example, with your children, extended family, working at a charity, etc.
Look out for Losers - Don't Rush2:02
Action step

If you are looking to start a new relationship take your time. Find out about their background and do not ignore any red flags that you see in their personality or actions.
Don’t Rush Into Marriage3:24
Action step

Be open-minded to advice and support from at least seven people from a wide cross-section.
Wins! As You Flourish1:33
Action step

Enjoy your new position as a role model to others. Share your experience when you believe it will help someone else to set themselves free.
Section Quiz

What About Divorce?1:33
Action step

Plan for your mixed emotions by remembering why you walked away from the abusive relationship. Get legal advice whether free or paid for to help you weigh up your options.
The Legal Separation And Divorce Process1:22
Action Step

Decide what is best for your situation; legal separation or divorce.
Legal Separation0:57
Action step

If you need to have a temporary hearing, start making the appointment.
The Divorce Process4:38
Action step

If you are going to get divorced, choose the grounds that best describe your situation.
Note About Children1:26
Action step

Write out a rough copy of what you would like in your statement of arrangement to get clarity before filling in the form.
Methods of Divorce5:30
Action step

Choose the method of divorce that best suits you.
The Clean Break Divorce1:23
Action step

Research the Clean break divorce, especially if you believe that it may affect you in the future.
Be Prepared For The Lies2:13
Action step

Journal and make a list about the types of manipulation and character of your abuser, which you believe that others may not obviously spot.
The Narcissist During Divorce1:12
Action step

Warn your friends, attorney and anyone else who is supporting you about the types of trickery and deception that your abuser may adopt during the divorce process.
Custody Caution1:41
Action step

If you are concerned about your abuser having open access to your children, make the authorities aware.
Get Support and Legal Advice2:31
Action steps

A.

Make a list of the best people to support you through this time of emotional ups and downs.

B.

Consider the information shared in the story. Journal about how it makes you feel and what you can do differently.
Changes in You Wider Relationships2:08
Action step

Start to wisely modify your friends and family list. Try to spend most of your time and energy on relationships that will help stretch you to be your best self and continue to progress in your life.
Dealing With Your Anger1:52
Action step

Seek support for anger management. Remember that there is nothing to be ashamed of but rather you should be proud of your decision to continue your growth.
Consequences Of Not Dealing With Anger1:24
Action step

In your personal time continue your growth by looking at videos on YouTube and reading articles about topics like anger management, forgiveness and personal development.
Words of Warning4:58
Action step

Read up on the relationship stories of Tina Turner, author J.K. Rowling, actress Robin Givens and actress, writer and comedian Brett Butler.
Section Quiz

Requirements

This course is appropriate for men and women ages 16 years and older.
A safe space to go through the course, away from an abuser
No prior knowledge or experience of abusive relationships is necessary

Description

Domestic abuse knows no barriers of age, religion, culture or gender; although the vast majority of victims are women. Be it Emotional Abuse, Physical Abuse, Financial Abuse, Sexual Abuse or Neglect, etc. this course unravels the dangers of abusive relationships and lays out a step-by-step plan to successfully put it behind you.

This course will take you from feeling devalued, disrespected, frustrated, confused, mentally tired or stressed, isolated, alone and in fear in an unhealthy relationship to being empowered, knowledgeable, confident, motivated, gaining mental and physical freedom, supported and flourishing in your new life.

I have personally been there, I experienced it and want to share the wealth of knowledge and information with you on how you too can survive and thrive. Why? Freedom! I want you to be Abuse-Free and live the FULFILLING life you were born to!

Take the steps today to see SMILES and HAPPINESS instead of tears caused by a toxic relationship and an abusive partner. Put yourself on the road to self-love, mental clarity and reclaiming your power.

As your instructor I will share insights and expertise from over two decades of personal experience, research and training in relationship dynamics.

Students will learn a number of key lessons including: spotting abuse, planning your exit, raising finance, successfully leaving your abuser once and for all and keys to never getting into another abusive relationship.

This 5 hours plus course is structured into 10 segments broken down into individual lectures, each in Power Point slides and videos, plus downloadable course material, tasks and insightful information. Each lecture has simple action steps and quizzes to reinforce your learning.

This course is suitable for men and women 16 years plus; or younger individuals who are in an abusive marriage and want to leave their abusive spouse.

Who this course is for:

Women who are victims of domestic violence
Men who are victims of domestic violence
Abusers wishing to change their attitude and behaviour
Women who are constantly stressed in their relationship and need clarity on whether the relationship is abusive or not
Individuals wanting to be more informed about what support they can offer to people they suspect or know are in abusive relationships
Professionals wanting to learn more about domestic violence and other types of relationship abuse
Victims ready to leave their abuser but needing clear guidance on how to do it safely and successfully

Time To Go: How To Safely Leave An Abusive Relationship

What you'll learn

Explore related topics

Course content

Welcome and Getting Started3 lectures • 7min

Introduction2 lectures • 2min

Types Of Abuse In Relationships5 lectures • 18min

Methods Of Abuse In Relationships12 lectures • 16min

Am I A Victim Of Abuse?14 lectures • 42min

It’s Time To Decide Your Next Move13 lectures • 19min

Time To Go!10 lectures • 15min

Financing Your Leaving Even If You Have No Money6 lectures • 13min

Settling Into Your New Life18 lectures • 42min

What about Divorce?15 lectures • 35min

Requirements

Description

Who this course is for: