The Power of Three Words: A Guide to Emotional Intelligence

Welcome to my first E-Course! I'm grateful for Udemy's platform as I hope to share this information with YOU, my Personal Transformation enthusiasts!

In a nut shell: 

Discover a powerful 3-word phrase that will increase your Emotional Intelligence (EQ).

Understand why EQ is essential for success in business, relationships, and personal growth.

This short e-course that will teach you a simple three-word phrase... apply it and you will see success in every area of your life. Each module includes key emotional intelligence competencies, a storytelling element, and applications across professional and personal contexts. Using this phrase opens dialogue, deepens awareness, and changes lives—internally and interpersonally.

Lesson 1: Welcome & Course Objectives

1. Learn how EQ:

   • Increases empathy

   • Enhances self-awareness

   • Elevates social skills

   • Deepens relationships

2. Define Emotional Intelligence as the ability to recognize, understand, manage, and influence emotions—both in yourself and others.

3. Explore how soft skills connected to EQ impact:

   • Leadership

   • Negotiation

   • Interpersonal relationships

   • Career growth and salary potential

4. Recognize that people with high EQ tend to earn more money.

5. Apply the 3-word phrase in a variety of contexts:

   • With coworkers, bosses, clients

   • In parenting and friendships

   • In self-talk and reflection

   • Even with strangers

6. Begin to shift both interpersonal and intrapersonal communication for lasting emotional growth.

Lesson 2: Introduction

• Introduction to the Thera Storm's logo featuring a fingerprint in favorite colors.

• The fingerprint symbolizes that:

  • Every client, situation, and person is utterly unique.

  • No two experiences are exactly alike—just like fingerprints.

• A powerful story illustrating how assumptions can mislead.

• Emphasizes the danger of presuming shared experience in grief or trauma.

• Highlights the importance of:

  • Pausing to ask before responding.

  • Recognizing the vast range of emotional responses to similar events.

  • Creating space for the client's unique narrative to emerge.

• Emotional intelligence isn’t built solely on education or credentials. Nothing replaces the healing power of:

  • Being a safe space

  • Listening without judgment

  • Being emotionally present

• Each story shared is as personal and individual as a fingerprint.

• Introduces the concept of radical curiosity:

  • A deep, intentional commitment to approach each person and situation with openness.

• Radical curiosity forms the foundation of the core 3-word phrase.

• It's both a personal and professional commitment to stay curious, not conclusive.

Lesson 3: Objectives Deeper Dive

1. Understand the prefixes:

   • "Intra" = within oneself (internal)

   • "Inter" = between people (external)

2. Learn how emotional intelligence (EQ) operates on two levels:

   • Intrapersonal (self-focused)

   • Interpersonal (relationship-focused)

3. Identify the three pillars of EQ being developed:

   • Empathy:

     • Intra: Compassion toward your own thoughts and feelings

     • Inter: Understanding others’ emotions and perspectives

   • Awareness:

     • Intra: Self-awareness—recognizing your own emotions and behaviors

     • Inter: Social awareness—noticing emotional cues in others

   • Mood Regulation:

     • Intra: Managing your own emotional state

     • Inter: Positively influencing emotional dynamics in interactions

4. Prepare to apply a 3-word phrase that builds EQ internally and externally.

Lesson 4: The Secret Sauce

1. “Tell Me More” is a simple yet powerful 3-word phrase.

2. It enhances emotional intelligence by encouraging deeper listening and reflection.

3. Using this phrase helps:

   • Foster deeper understanding

   • Build stronger interpersonal connections

   • Promote empathy and curiosity

4. It can be used in:

   • Interpersonal situations – to connect with others

   • Intrapersonal situations – to explore your own thoughts and emotions

5. This section will use stories and real-life examples to show how “Tell Me More” can be:

   • Understood clearly

   • Emotionally relatable

   • Applied immediately in your life

Lesson 5: INTER-Personally

Core Concept: “Tell Me More” as a Tool

• Encourages deeper sharing, understanding, and connection.

• Signals genuine interest and fosters emotional safety.

• Builds empathy by helping us see others’ perspectives.

• Useful in both professional and personal relationships.

• Prevents assumptions and misinterpretations.

Application Stories and Lessons

Story: The Gym Trainer in Portugal

• Trainer made assumptions based on stereotypes and defaulted to appearance-focused questions.

• Missed an opportunity to ask: “Why are you here? Tell me more.”

• Lesson: Professionals must stay curious and avoid projection.

Story: School Counselor & Childhood Divorce

• Counselor made an assumption with: “It’s not your fault.”

• This introduced doubt and confusion.

• Lesson: Don’t project common narratives onto unique experiences—ask first, listen deeply.

Story: The Pencil Eraser & Unresolved Grief

• A husband's disproportionate reaction to a lost eraser tied to unresolved trauma of losing his mother.

• Friend’s judgment shifted to empathy after she said: “Tell me more.”

• Lesson: Emotional outbursts may be connected to deeper unresolved pain.

Story: Missing the School in Rome

• Daughter says, “I miss my school in Rome.”

• Parent assumes it’s about friends/teacher—but it was the symmetrical building design.

• Lesson: Even with loved ones, assumptions can mislead—“Tell me more” opens clarity.

Final Reflections

• Emotional intelligence ≠ constant emotional deep dives.

• It's about pausing assumptions, making space, and asking others to elaborate first.

• “Tell me more”:

  • Builds trust.

  • Deepens communication.

  • Strengthens both personal and professional bonds.

• This phrase has universal relevance—beyond therapy or grief—it’s applicable in everyday life.

Lesson 6: INTRA-personally

Core Concept: "Tell Me More" Intrapersonally

• Use “Tell Me More” as a self-inquiry tool when facing strong emotions or challenges.

• Helps identify underlying beliefs, thoughts, or patterns.

• Encourages self-awareness, emotional regulation, and mental clarity.

• Promotes curiosity instead of self-judgment.

Practical Prompts to Ask Yourself

• “I feel frustrated — tell me more about why I feel this way.”

• “What can I learn from this — tell me more about the opportunity here.”

• “What thought or belief is underneath this emotion?”

Key Lessons & Stories

Story: The Bartender Dream

• Trigger: Husband casually shares post-retirement dream of bartending.

• Immediate internal reaction: Rage.

• Through self-inquiry, discovered resentment about always sacrificing her own career.

• Outcome: Emotional shift from anger to empathy and clarity on her own purpose.

• Lesson: “Tell Me More” helps untangle intense emotions to reveal deeper needs.

Story: Hearing What Wasn't Said

• Daughter says: “We are out of bread”, internalized as: “You’re a terrible mom.”

• Boss says: “Numbers are low”, internalized as: “You’re going to be fired.”

• Lesson: Self-reflection helps us notice when we’re projecting fears or assumptions.

• "Tell me more" fosters objective thinking over automatic self-blame or criticism.

Naming Emotions More Precisely

• Sometimes we just feel “off” — not everything is simply happy, sad, or angry.

• Consider more nuanced feelings: dismissed, excluded, invisible, inferior, etc.

• Helps trace back to root causes like unmet needs, exhaustion, hormones, or past wounds.

• Lesson: Descriptive emotional vocabulary enhances clarity and compassion.

Emotional Regulation & Nervous System

• Pausing to self-reflect with “Tell Me More”:

  • Calms the nervous system.

  • Reduces emotional reactivity.

  • Brings awareness and control over thoughts and behaviors.

• Lesson: Self-inquiry is a powerful act of emotional intelligence and self-care.

  
  

Lesson 7: Conclusion

• Key Takeaways: The Power of “Tell Me More”

  • A small phrase with big impact—fosters curiosity, connection, and compassion.

  • Works both interpersonally and intrapersonally—in conversations with others and in self-reflection.

  • Promotes emotional exploration and a deeper understanding of thoughts, feelings, and motivations.

  • Enhances emotional intelligence by encouraging sensitivity and thoughtful inquiry.

  • Strengthens communication, empathy, and relational trust.

  Closing Message

  • This tool is simple to use and easy to apply in daily life.

  • Practicing it regularly can lead to personal growth and stronger relationships.

  • Try using “Tell Me More” today and observe how it shifts your conversations and self-talk.

  • Thank you for participating—here’s to your journey in emotional intelligence!