The Big 3 Battles: Eating, Sleeping, and Cleaning Up Toys

Let's start by looking at the battle against eating. For your child, maybe it's that they eat the same three or four foods and refuse to try anything else (can you say chicken nuggets?). Maybe your child refuses to eat anything green, or they eat two or three bites out of five different things but finishes none of them. Perhaps your child is the one who snacks all day long and then refuses to eat at mealtimes. Or, maybe they eat so slow they are always the last one at the table and you've lost all patience by the end.

There are lots of ways our children can make mealtimes into battle grounds. Let's look at three strategies for making mealtimes more enjoyable- remember, consistency, repetition, and team work are going to be our best defenses. There are sections of content for each area, as well as resources listed under this lecture.

Something I say often is that "consistency is key", and here's why. Our children cannot read our mind any more than we can read theirs. They do not know what our expectations are unless we say them out loud, and they won't know the consequences of not meeting those expectations unless we also tell them that part, too. Accordingly, how are they to know that the fifth time you ask them to do something is the time you're going to explode? Or that while you gave them four warnings last time, today you're not in the mood to mess around and two warnings is all they get until they loose all TV time for the rest of the day. If you employ consistency- in both your expectations and in the consequences, your child will have a better understanding of what they're supposed to do, when they're supposed to do it, and what will happen if they don't.

I caution you here. DO NOT create an expectation that cannot be met, and DO NOT create a punishment that you cannot or will not follow through on. Do not threaten to take away going to their cousin's birthday party if you not attending isn't really an option. They will call your bluff. And then you'll fold. And then they've won. Keep your expectations appropriate and your consequences natural.

Let's look specifically at eating. One of the biggest complaints is that kids will only eat a few select items, unwilling to try anything new, or dare I say, healthy. One way to employ consistency is to state before each meal that this is what is on the table, and they may eat as much of anything there as they want, but there will be nothing else served. And then follow that up with NOT making auxiliary chicken nuggets when they refuse to try what you've already made. The consistency comes when you do this every day- every meal, every snack. You can allow them to help choose the menu, include some of their favorite things from time to time, but the expectations is always that they eat what was made and that nothing else will be offered until the next meal or scheduled snack time.

Trust me, your child will not starve to death. They will eat a piece of broccoli before they waste away to nothing.

Here's another example- let's say your child eats extremely slow. First, let's consider that perhaps you are eating fast, and by comparison, they seem like a turtle trudging through mud. Determine a reasonable amount of time for dinner, say 30 minutes or so, and then sit down together for that meal and stay there for that long, even if you finish eating first. Explain ahead of time that once the meal is over, it is time to get up and clear the dishes. Give ample warnings, 10, 5, and even 2 minutes before the meal time ends, and then once it is over let them take one last bite and then remove their plate. Saving their leftovers for later is a great option so they don't feel like they're missing out on any food. Remember, if this is the expectation you set, that lunch time is only 30 minutes long, then consistently watch the time and keep it the same everyday. Even if they beg you to keep eating, let them know that they have had plenty of time to eat and they may have the rest later for a snack.

One more- your child snacks all day long, but then refuses to eat at mealtimes. There are two ways you could handle this. First, you could set the expectation that meal times are to be experienced together and even if they are not eating, they will still be required to be at the table with you. Then, offer meal type foods as snack items instead so you're sure they're getting the right nutrition. Second, you can limit the number of snacks or the amount of food offered at those times. A snack is a piece of fruit and that it is all. Or, a snack is one scoop of crackers and piece of cheese, not crackers, cheese, a yogurt, 2 cookies, and half a sandwich. Limiting the food they eat between meals will likely make them more hungry and ready to eat at meal times, but beware, it could also lead to a hangry kid if you're not careful. Limit wisely. Either way, tell your child the plan for snacks and meals and then stick to it. Even when they whine and cry that they are starving (they're not), or when they whine and cry because they're not hungry (that's okay). Make a plan and stick to it. Every day. Exceptions should be few and far between. Remember, consistency is key!

The second strategy we can use is repetition. You may have heard this before, but the neurons in our brains are like a dense forrest. Let's say you want to learn something, like knowing that trying a new vegetable won't hurt us, and we might even like it. The first time we walk that path, we are merely clearing some of the brush out of the way, like we would when we walked a new path in the forrest. The second time, there is less to clear away and it gets a little easier. The tenth time we walk it, it looks like a real path, and the 20th time we walk through it is a nice, wide, easy to walk path. This is how repetition work in our brains. The more we "walk" through the thoughts, the easier the path becomes.

It is totally normal to have to tell your child something 100 times before they really understand. They have a lot of path clearing to do. Plus, the first time they hear something may actually be the first time in their entire lives they have heard that. They have little to no past experience to draw from to know if it is true, or good, or possible. They need more time to build the understanding we as adults take for granted.

Let's go back to the first example of a child who won't try new foods, or vegetables in general.  Determine to introduce a new item at regular intervals. Not everyday, but maybe once a week, or once every other week, and then offer that new item repeatedly. Over and over. Make it part of meals, part of snacks, or all of a snack time. Try it in different ways, or in different forms. But keep offering. If you offer once and then never again, saying "my kid won't eat that anyway", then you are limiting them to having to walk the path toward broccoli just the once, when it's hard and full of brush and undergrowth, like the forrest. Use repetition to build their neural pathways toward new foods. It may take awhile, but soon the path leading to "trying new things isn't so bad!" will become a wide, easy road for your child to travel often.

In our second example from before, we talked about the child who is hunger all the time, except at mealtimes. In this case, repetition is used in our verbal communication of meal and snack times. You'll also be repeating that it's okay if they don't eat, but they have to sit at the table- or whatever expectations you have set to get them to participate in family meals. It will feel like you are saying the same thing over and over again. That's because you are. And that's exactly what you should be doing. In fact, if you can come up with a script that you and other use to remind the child of the expectations and/or consequences (such as, "I know you're hungry, and lunch will be when the clock has a 1 and a 2 on it.") it will help form those specific pathways in their brain all the better.

For the child who is a super slow eater, repetition will be used, again, in saying over and over that the meal or snack time will end in 10, or 5, or 2 minutes, and that "I will save the rest for you to eat later." Find a script that works for you and repeat it. Say it before the meal, during the meal, and after, so they know expectations haven't changed along the way.

Keep consistent and use repetition to help your child understand what they should do, when they should do it, and what will happen if they don't.

Strategy number 3 is to use team work. It may seem obvious to some that we cannot expect our child to have full autonomy and independence in eating, sleeping, and cleaning up. However, we can make a noticeable difference on their behavior during these times by clearly stating that they are not alone and that you are in this together. Your child wants nothing more than to feel loved and accepted. Taking time to tell them, and show them, that those things are true can go a long way in calming the battle.

In this context, the battle against eating, teamwork means making mealtimes, food choices, and even cooking a collective effort. Let's look at our three typical scenarios one more time.

For the child who refuses to eat more than chicken nuggets and goldfish crackers- do some grocery shopping together, plan a meal that includes one new food, look up cooking videos or TikToks showing how to prepare it, and then try it together. Include them in the process. Be a team. You could suggest making a chart of new things you've tried with happy faces if they liked it and sad faces if they didn't. Let them know that it's okay if they try it and really don't like it. Everyone has foods they don't like. But maybe they will like it- we'll never know until we try! Check the resources for this lecture to find a sample chart and a blank one you can fill out on your own. Making your child part of the process of choosing and preparing new foods will give them some much needed control over the situation, and sometimes that feeling of control of what we have to eat will make us more willing to actually eat it.

The child who is hungry all day, except when it's time to eat a healthy lunch or dinner, will also need to feel like actual mealtimes are a team event. Make sure when this child tells you they are hungry but it's not time to eat yet, you tell them you understand how it feels to be hungry and that you are also looking forward to lunch. It's okay to say that you're hungry too, commiserate with them a little bit, let them know they are not alone. Of course, we know they likely just want to eat the snack food and aren't really that hungry, but acknowledge their stated feelings and reinforce that the next meal is coming soon and you can both eat together. And then, make sure you are present, both physically and mentally, during meals. Don't be on your phone or watching the news, don't set them up to eat while you go do something else real quick- be a teammate during those times.

Lastly, the one struggling to finish a meal in a reasonable amount of time also needs to feel like they are not alone. Help them along by having races (I used to challenge my children to see who could chug their milk the fastest) or by counting bites, or playing a game (put on their favorite song from Moana and every time they hear the phrase "you're welcome" you both have to take a bite). Make meals fun. The same will work for finishing the meal. When the time is up, and they're done chewing their last bite, ask them if they want to carry the plates or carry the cups to the sink and clean up the meal together, as a team. Or, tell them, "I'm going to carry three things to the kitchen, how many can you carry?" A simple team work challenge might motivate them to move on from the meal time that has ended and to help with the clean up process a little bit, too!

Being consistent, using repetition, and working as a team can help make mealtimes more peaceful and more enjoyable, for everyone!

Just like with the eating battle, we're going to look at three of the most common issues when it comes to getting your child to sleep. We'll look through the lens of each of the three strategies- consistency, repetition, and teamwork- to see how they can help us when your child won't go to bed, when they won't stay in bed, and when they won't sleep without us.

This is a big battle for many caregivers, and just like with eating, there are no magic solutions. But, we also don't have to resign ourselves to suffering either. Children who struggle with bedtime and sleep may not be tired, may be afraid they will be missing out on something fun, or may be scared. As you go through the following scenarios, think about your personal situation to see if any of these ideas sound like they could work for you.

For more input, read through the Mayo Clinic article linked in the resources.

Just like with getting our kids to eat, consistency is key when it comes to sleeping. Consistent expectations, consistent routines, consistent consequences. Remember, our children cannot read our minds. The only way they know what we expect is for us to tell them, and if our expectations change, then that needs to be shared, too. We can't give them a 10 minute warning before bed one night and then no warning the next night and expect them to go to bed the same way both times.

Let's go through the three most common problems around sleeping and see how consistency can be a game changer.

First, if you are struggling to get your child to even go to bed in the first place, a consistent bedtime routine could be your new best friend. We need to prepare them for what is coming, make it clear that bedtime is not a negotiation, and help them be physically and mentally ready for it when it comes. This can be accomplished with a consistent bedtime routine. Bonus points if you involve your child in the planning of the routine! Sit down and make a list of the things that have to happen before bed, such as turning electronic devices off at a certain time, getting pajamas on, brushing their teeth, getting into bed, and then reading a story. You can add or subtract anything that you feel is, or isn't, important. Maybe you need to add in the finding of the beloved stuffy, or include bath time before pajamas. Whatever works for you, make sure that your child knows the steps to be taken ahead of time. It's best to plan this routine together during the day, not at bedtime itself. Review it after dinner so they remember what they agreed to, and then pull out the list when it's time to start going through it task by task. There doesn't have to be time limits attached, but there can be if you need that motivation. Follow this routine consistently, night after night, with little to no variation until they have realized that this is how bedtime works. If you set up a routine, do it for five days straight, and then slack off over the weekend, you are sending mixed signals that your child won't be able to interpret. Once a solid sleep routine has been established (months down the line, likely) then you can have fun movie nights that push bedtime out the window. But beware, too many of those and you will be right back where you started with no routine at all. Remember, managing these behaviors is a time and energy commitment!

The child who goes to bed without trouble most nights, but refuses to stay there long enough to actually fall asleep is another challenge. Consistent routine can help here as well, but you will need to add in the consistency of returning them to bed without reward for getting up. That means they don't get extra water, or another story, or another stuffed animal, or another hug. Make sure you give them all they need the first time you tuck them in, a cup of water, the requested animals, the one story, and the 2 or 3 hugs they want, so when they get up you can say, "you already got that from me, and now it is time to stay in bed." Consistently. If ever you give in to their post bedtime demand, you have reinforced the getting up behavior. Give them as little attention as possible and put them straight back to bed. It may also help to minimize the noise, both human and TV related, that they can hear from their bed. If they feel like they are missing out on the life you are clearly living without them in the other room it will be nearly impossible for them to resist the urge to join you again.

Some kids have a hard time getting to sleep without a grownup with them. Again, a clear and consistent bedtime routine will help prepare them for the inevitable tuck in and "goodnight". Add into that routine anything they need to feel safe- a night light turned on, music playing softly, a closet or under-the-bed check, etc. Be prepared for the protest that is sure to come when you say the final goodnight and leave the room. There may be yelling, screaming, or crying involved, and that's okay. Trust me when I say I know how hard it is to stand in the hallway and listen to your young child crying for you. It is heartbreaking. Try to remember that you are building a strong, confident human, and part of that is them learning that they are okay, even when they have big feelings. They may be scared, or they may just want your attention. Set yourself strong in saying good night and leaving the room, and then staying away. You can work your way out of the room a little at a time (3 nights in chair next to the bed instead of in the bed, then a few nights in a chair in the middle of the room, and then in a chair by the door, and then in a chair outside the open door, and then...you get the idea) or you can go cold turkey and leave the room altogether right away. I suggest staying close by for a while, so they know you didn't really leave them, until they have a better handle on how to deal with you leaving them at bedtime. But, don't be in bed with them. That's the behavior we're trying to move away from. Right?

These sleeping battles can take the most out of us as caregivers, since they take place at the end of what was surely a long day already. Keeping routines and expectations consistent can help your child understand the rhythm of sleep and bedtime.

Once we have established a consistent routine and have expressed consistent expectations, we must repeat those things over and over again, making neural pathways in our child's brain.

In the scenario with the child who won't go to bed, that routine must be completed every night. Without fail. For what will seem like a long time. Months, maybe. Without exception. Be committed to changing this behavior and in the long run, you'll be glad those few months of focus happened. Repeat the expectation that the routine will happen, every day before bedtime even starts, even if they say they already know. Ask them to repeat the expectation back to you, having them use their own words to express how bed time will go. See if they can list the steps of the routine and then let them know how proud you are of their memory when they get parts in the right order. Have the routine written down, or better yet, depicted in pictures, posted in their bedroom, in the bathroom, and even the kitchen. That way they see it and can reference it over and over again in any room where parts of the routine take place.

Repetition for the child who won't stay in bed looks like repeatedly putting them back in their room, in their bed, and then stating that they must stay until morning. Repeating phrases like "once we say goodnight you have to stay in your bed." and "you may not be out of bed after we say goodnight" or even "go back to bed, I'll see you again in the morning".Repeat the same words over and over, time after time, night after night, without fail. I know it sounds horribly monotonous, but this is how we prove that we mean what we say, bedtime means we stay in bed, and get that path in their brain nice and big and easy to mentally walk. And don't forget to reward yourself, too, when you have made it through another round of steering your child back to their room, kicking and screaming. Well done, you!

The child who is afraid to sleep without you will need the most repetitions of safety routines and reassuring words. Repeat calming, caring words, giving them their own mantra to say when they need to. Something like, "everything is okay" or "my mom is just downstairs, I'll see her in the morning". The one who wants your attention will definitely need repeated reminders that tomorrow is another day to be together but right now it is time to be asleep in your own beds. If your child joins you in your bed in the middle of the night, return them to their own room right away, tuck them back in, repeat the calming words, and stay strong in your resolve to break the habit of them coming into your room.

These things are hard to do, but in the long run it will pay off to be able to tuck your child in and then relax on your own, or to have the whole bed to yourself, all night long. Stay consistent and repeat your expectations again and again. But don't forget about teamwork, too.

Including your child in any and all discussions about bedtime expectations and routines will help them understand that their actions are affecting others in the home and family. Calmly explain that you get tired too, and you need to be able to go to bed but can't until they themselves have gone to bed. Let them know that you don't sleep well when they keep coming into your room and climbing in your bed every night. Make sure they know that you need sleep just as much as they do, and that you need to work together to make sure everyone in the house is getting enough shut eye.

If your child never wants to go to bed, try making it seem as though the whole house is going to bed at the same time. Have older children go to their rooms and close the door so the younger ones don't know they're not actually sleeping. You too, can retire to your bedroom for a few minutes after the tuck in, turning off the lights and TV in the rest of the house. This way, it feels like going to bed is something we all do together and by doing so, your child is part of the team. If the rest of the house can't go to bed that early, you can be your child's teammate alone and "go to bed" together, just the two of you. Do your routines together, put on pajamas, brush your teeth, get glasses of water for both of you, etc. Doing it with your child will help them not feel singled out for the not fun event that bedtime is, and will connect them to the fact that everyone has a bedtime.

Working together as a team can help to keep your child in their bed, too. Remark out loud that your job is to get the drink of water, the favorite blanket, and turn on the nightlight, while their job is to put their pajamas on, pick the story to read, and to get under the covers. You each have roles to play in the process, and by working together you can complete the whole bedtime routine. After tuck-ins, remind your child that now is their turn to sleep and your turn to wash the dishes, or fold the laundry, or some other not fun activity, and that tomorrow you will be able to play together again. By working together on the routine leading up to bed time, and helping them notice it, you are giving them attention ahead of time so they may not feel so left out later on when you leave the room. Talk to them while brushing teeth, sing a song together while bathing, just be together with no distractions for the time it takes to get ready for bed. Giving them extra attention will help them feel like part of the team, even when you are no longer together.

Team work for the child who won't fall asleep by themselves looks like you helping them fall asleep progressively less and less over time. Remember the example earlier of moving your chair across the room little bits at a time until you're sitting in the doorway, and then outside the door? Doing this lets them know they are not alone, that you understand their feelings, and you are there to help them through it. Similarly, you could decide that the best course of action for your child is to leave them in bed, alone in the room, right away, but peek in the door every 3 minutes to let them know you're still there. Then in a few days, peek in every 5 minutes, and then every 7 minutes a few days after that, and so on until they are comfortable falling asleep before you get back to check on them. These tricks will take persistence on your part, but can be the gradual steps to sleeping independently that your child needs.

It is possible to win the battle against sleeping, but it will take consistency, repetition, and team work- not to mention time and patience, too!

Last, but not least, let's dive into the battle that ensues every time we try to get kids to pick up their toys or clean up their mess.

Something I said earlier, and want to reiterate now, is that these behaviors are totally typical for young children. Or children of any age, really. Heck, I'm an adult and most of the time I don't want to clean either.

Putting ourselves in the place of the child for a moment, let's realize that dumping out bins of toys is super satisfying. It feels good in our muscles as we lift the heavy box, turn it over, and feel it get lighter. It sounds cool to hear all of those blocks or legos pour out onto the floor. It looks neat when the toys all spill out, some making a pile and some moving further away. Dumping out toys is a pleasing activity to many of our senses. Picking them up, one at a time, is not at all pleasing to any part of us. It is boring, it is monotonous, and it means that the fun is over, play time has ended.

Not wanting to clean is perfectly normal behavior. However, it still has to get done, so the trick is to teach our children that we sometimes have to do things we don't want to do, and that it won't last forever. Check out the online article from the Fatherly website in the resources below.

There are a few areas in which consistency can make a positive difference. Such as, making a certain time of day clean up time. Choose a time of day- before dinner, before bed, whatever time works for your family- and keep that consistent schedule. It will help if you can pull out the "we clean up our toys everyday at this time, you know that" card, but that means you actually have to establish that you clean up the toys everyday at that time. Skipping days will make it confusing and your child will push back against the call to clean on days when you decide it's important. Keep it a regular part of your day, but don't over manage the mess. One clean up time, maybe two at most, per day is sufficient. Micro-managing the mess by stopping to clean every half hour will kill the fun and agitate your child to no end. Let them play without worry, and then tackle the mess at the very end.

Consistency in where the toys go will also help. If your child knows exactly where to put all of the trucks, it will be easier for them to put them away. Label toy bins with pictures of what goes inside, label shelves with pictures of what sits there. Don't make it too complicated (let's not spend time sorting all of the legos by color every single day) but be intentional about where things go so it's easy for your child to find each toy's rightful place in the room.

Another area to take note of is to consistently model the behavior you want to see in your child. If you want them to pick up their toys, then you need to show them that you can pick up your things, too, at the end of the day. If they make a mess with the craft supplies and you want them to clean it up, make sure that you are also modeling how to do that when you are done with a project. Consistency is key- for everyone!

Aside from repeating the clean up process everyday, repetition plays a part by creating ritual around the act of picking up toys. Use the same phrases, give the same warnings (10, 5, and 2 minutes ahead of time), play the same music while working on it, do the same high five or secret handshake when you've completed the task, etc. Find little things that can make the clean up more fun, little rituals that bring levity to the task.

Repeat your expectations at the beginning of the day, a couple of times in the middle, and again as the day gets close to ending saying something like "don't forget, you will have to work to put all of that away before bed" or "just a reminder that all of those toys will have to be picked up before we can start our movie tonight". Repeating reminders throughout the day can help prepare them for the inevitable outcome and give you the fall back that "I told you that we would have to put all of this away again" when they fight against it. Without the ability to say "I told you so" (but in better words for the child) we can't be sure that they understood what we wanted to happen at clean up time. Even if we have said it a dozen times every day for the last week, if you didn't say it today, then we didn't help that pathway get any bigger and maybe they were walking a brand new path where they didn't have to clean up.

If you set consequences for NOT helping to clean up, make sure they are natural consequences. This means that the consequence for not putting the books away shouldn't be that you don't get any ice cream. Ice cream and books have nothing to do with each other. You've just used ice cream as a threat. Instead, if the books aren't put back on the shelf, then they go on the grownup bookshelf somewhere else and they won't get to read them for a while. Same for toy cars, or blocks. Don't threaten anything, just simply state that if they cannot take care of their toys then the toys go somewhere else until they can put them away correctly. It's a natural consequence that if the toys aren't cleaned up then you don't get to play with them again tomorrow. They can have them back to try again the day after that.

Note, that if both you and your child are overwhelmed by the amount of toys to put away at the end of the day, it is very likely that they have too many toys. Consider rotating toys every month so they're not all out at the same time, using a toy lending library instead of owning everything they want, or gifting some to another family who doesn't have as many as you do.

Just like I said before, it isn't reasonable to expect your child to clean up all by themselves at a  young age. You cannot tell your child to clean their room, then walk away for 20 minutes, and then reasonably expect that when you come back it will be done. You will need to1 team up to clean up.

This looks like sharing the load, working together to pick up all of the blocks, or clean up all of the art supplies. Or it looks like splitting the tasks, like "you do the matchbox cars and I'll do the baby doll stuff". It could also look like letting them decide how to divide the tasks. Ask them how they want you to help, and then come back with a counter-offer if theirs is too heavily weighted on you cleaning and them playing. The conversation could sound like:

"Wow. you have a lot of toys out. How can I help you clean them up now?"
"You can put away all of the crayons and markers while I finish my block tower."
"That sounds like I will be cleaning while you are playing. How about we leave the block tower up for you to finish tomorrow, and we both clean up all of the art supplies?"

Finding ways to work together at clean up time will help the tasks get done in a reasonable amount of time as well as building your child's confidence in their ability to do hard things. Just make sure you're not doing all of the work yourself- that doesn't teach them the desired skills, unless you want them to be good at tricking others into doing the dirty work.

Consistency, repetition, and team work- along with easy to navigate storage options and a reasonable amount of toys- can make clean up time easier on both of you.

Next, we're going to talk about creating your plans, and then sticking to them.

Before you make your battle plans, let's look back at some of the ideas presented to help your child eat, sleep, and clean up their toys.

Eating:
Offering what was cooked for the meal but nothing else
Setting a reasonable amount of time for a meal
Limiting the number snacks in a day
Allowing your child to plan the meals and help prepare the new foods
Using games or songs to engage the child in eating at a regular pace

Sleeping:
Establishing a solid, regular bedtime routine
Return your child to bed every single time they get up or get in your bed during the night
Repeat the expectation that they are to sleep in their own bed the entire night
Employ safety checks (closet and under the bed) and use a nightlight
Phase yourself away from them while they learn to fall asleep alone

Cleaning Up Toys:
Use labels and designated bins for like toys
Make clean up time at the same time every day
Work at it together, sharing tasks
Find fun rituals, like music or dances, to help make it a more enjoyable experience

Do any of these things sound like something you would like to try with your child?

Let's jot down the beginnings of a plan together. You can use a blank sheet of paper, a page in a notebook or journal, or the planning guide sheet in the resources below.

At the top of the page, name the area you want to work on most. Just pick one thing at a time. I realize you may be struggling with more than one of these areas, and may have even thought of other issues you can apply the three strategies to, but just pick one to start with. If you buckle down on too many things at once, your child will become overwhelmed and it will defeat your purpose to form new behaviors.

Now, describe your child's behavior during this battle. It can be descriptive words like loud, disruptive, stubborn, etc. or they can be feeling words that describe how their behavior affects you, such as frustrating, annoying, or exhausting. Describe it any way you want. This is just for you to use, so write any words that come to mind.

Next, specifically name the one thing you want to work on. If you wrote Sleep at the top, here you can describe the type of behavior you want to change, ie; sleeping in their own bed, or going to bed without a fight.

Was there an idea mentioned that you think might work for you, or did you think of something else during the course? Write down what you would like try. Link it to being consistent, repetitious, or working as a team if you can. Feel free to list two or three strategies, as long as they all work together on the same larger goal.

Lastly, decide how you will implement this idea or strategy before, during, and after the battle. Jot down one or two things you could do or say before bedtime, during bedtime, and even the next morning that will encourage, support, and remind your child.

Before you close out of this lecture, sign your plan and commit yourself to trying it- remember we're building new neural pathways and these take time. Plan on sticking with it for a whole month at the very least before you reevaluate whether or not it is working.

Pro tip- it will seem to get worse before it gets better. Your child's current set of behaviors have been happening for quite some time already. They will fight against trying to change them at first. But stick with it. You'll be glad you did.

If you are an enrolled family at JMPNS, please take a few minutes to fill out the short google form in the resources. Without this form submitted, you will not get credit toward your required education hours.

If you are not an enrolled family, but would like to share your thoughts or feedback, feel free to use the google form link to do so.

If you are not an enrolled family, but would like to be, visit our website listed in the resources below the final video.

Thank you for attending our online course entitled The Big 3 Battles: Eating, Sleeping, and Cleaning Up Toys. I do hope you found useful information in these videos and resources. Look for other Caregiver Support courses from James Marshall Parent Nursery School, and feel free to check out our program website at www.jmpns.org. Thank you, and keep up the good work.