Hello and welcome to the next lecture. For this lecture we are going to take a trip down memory lane. I want you to think back to your childhood and remember everything you can remember about alcohol before you started drinking? How did your family view alcohol? Did your parents drink? Did you see family members or friends of the family drunk? What were taught about drinking from your parents? What about at school? It’s important to remember these things because I am here to tell you that 99% of what you learned about was probably wrong.

There was a study done recently that showed that parents are not teaching their kids about alcohol. A high percentage of parents believe that by allowing their children to drink at home, makes them safer. It does not. In fact, it increases their risk for addiction. I know that most parents tend to turn a blind eye when their children are drinking but instead they should be role models in showing abstinence or very light drinking around their children and teens. Also, an open dialogue is crucial such as the health and behavioural  consequences of drinking.

Now think back to your to your very first drink. Even if it was a small sip from your parents. What do you remember from that drink? What did it taste like? What did it smell like? Do you feel like your first sip of alcohol was okay or taught you responsibility? Probably not or you wouldn’t be here today.

Now think about the first time you got drunk. What did it feel like? Who were you with? How old were you? Would you want to see your own child behave like? It’s important to try and put things into perspective. Thinking back to how it all started can be very eye opening for some people.

The younger a person starts to drink, the higher chances they have of becoming an alcoholic. As your body builds up an immunity to alcohol the more you drink. So let’s think about this. If a person has their first drink at age 14. Take a look at this chart

14 3-4 times per year (only once every three months) (1 alcoholic drink each time)

15 every other month (6 times per year) (1 alcoholic drinks each time)

16 every month (12 times per year) (2 alcoholic drinks each time)

17 every other weekend (26 times per year) (2 alcoholic drinks each time)

18 every weekend *** college aged - Friday or Saturday (3 alcoholic drinks each time)

19 every Friday and Saturday (twice per week) (3 alcoholic drinks each time)

20 Thursday, Friday and Saturday - (3 times per week) (4 alcoholic drinks each time)

21 Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday - 4 times per week - 4 alcoholic drinks each times = 16 drinks per week

22 Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday = 2 alcoholic drinks each time

23 Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday = 2 alcoholic drinks each time

24 7 days a week = 2 alcoholic drinks Sunday - Thursday, Friday and Saturday = 3 alcoholic drinks on friday and Saturday

25-30 16 alcoholic drinks per week

31-35 21 alcoholic drinks per week

26-40 26 drinks per week

41-45 31 drinks per week

46-50 36 drinks per week

51-55 41 drinks per week

56-60 46 drinks per week

You can see by just adding 1 drink per week per year how it creeps up and how so many people go from just a few per week to full blown alcoholics during their prime years! Don’t let this happen to you! Because it will slowly start to creep and you may have no idea until it starts becoming a problem - a problem for your health, your relationships and your mind.

We’re going to talk about how much you really drink. Let’s not sugar coat this part - please. Nobody has to know other than you so if you are planning to fudge the numbers a bit - understand that that behavior would be considered denial and you need to get past that stage now. I want you to take a full 7 days to gather the number of drink you have. 1 shot = 1 drink, 1 beer = 1 drink. It’s a little tricky when you talk about wine - 8oz is 1 drink and please measure this out. Most wine glasses are much larger and people often have 2-3 drinks thinking it’s only 1.

Go ahead and tally this up. I recommend that you pause this course here for a full 7 days so you can do this right and fill out your journal entirely. If you have already gone through detox, please don’t drink. Just try to remember, in a typical day, how many drinks you would have and don’t forget to  calculate your weekends. If you are abstaining currently, go ahead and continue on to the next lecture. If you are drinking, I’ll see you in about a week in the next lecture.

By now you should have about a week's worth of data recorded in your journal. Hopefully you recorded your drinks on a typical you have. I know that some weeks you may drink and some you may drink less so keep that in mind when you start to crunch the numbers.

Now I want you to fill out the chart in your workbook. You are going to take the number of drinks you had in a week and multiply that number by 4 to get your monthly total. You can multiply your weekly number by 52 to get your yearly total.

Now this number has a huge range because not everybody drinks the same type of alcohol. There’s beer, hard liquor, cheap liquor, wine, etc. You need to figure out how much each drink costs. Now if that gets complicated - work through it! How many glasses of wine are in a bottle? How much is a bottle of wine? Do you buy beer by the 6 pack or 12 pack? An easy way to measure hard liquor is to find the number of oz on the bottle and know that a shot is [insert number] 1.5 oz. Then you take the price of the bottle and divide it by the number of drinks.

This is why I had you journal for a week. Many people don’t just drink one kind of drink so you need to not only find the number of drinks you drink per week but how you spent last week. Don’t forget to then multiply that number to find your monthly and yearly cost.

Now I want you to make a plan for what you would do with that money instead. Quitting alcohol is the one drug you have to taper down so the cost savings won’t be immediate unless you can quit cold turkey which remember I don’t recommend you do.

Make future plans now though. Have that end goal in site and always refer back to it. Think about what you would do with one year's worth of quitting alcohol. Go on a vacation? Buy a new car? Pay off debt or student loans? Right it down. Take a picture of it or hang it up on your wall.

Another way to think about it is this: if someone paid you to stop drinking would you do it? Think of this as paying yourself. Financial motivation should be part of the overall picture. See you in the next lecture!

In this unit we are going to talk about other people. The reason I have dedicated an entire unit to talking about other people is because no matter you control your own body, you can’t control other people. For this reason, it’s important to educate yourself on, in my opinion, the hardest part about not drinking and that’s how to deal with other people. Most adults drink. It’s true and the numbers are staggering. The number of people who struggle constantly is astronomically high. Some people are good at hiding it while others not so much.

While not everyone is an alcoholic, per se, which remember, there’s a spectrum and there is no black and white line to distinguish an alcoholic vs someone who is not, it’s important to understand that you are not alone.

Here’s how to spot someone who has a problem. If someone justifies how little they drink - they are keeping track. Anybody who has to keep track, has a problem. Those who don’t have a problem would honestly not have to count how many drinks so they can justify how little they drink to anyone. So next time someone tries to babble about how little they drink - just move on because you now know the truth. Don’t argue and most importantly don’t let them make you feel bad about how much you drink.

Another way you can spot an alcoholic is if someone is simply not willing to give it up. I had a client once tell me that their 10 year old son asked him to just not drink for one night. He told me that he got mad at his child because he felt like it wasn’t his place to ask him to do such a thing. I asked him if he tried to not drink for a night and he did not. That was a definite indicator that there was a problem. Anyone who can’t go anywhere without a drink or two or who secretly drinks before a social event, has a problem.

So here’s what I want you to do. I want you to observe your friends and family members. Don’t tell them that you are observing them because well that’s just creepy and quite frankly it would definitely cause a bit of a ruckus - like why the hell would you be watching someone secretly. This is something I want you to do for you - just so you can see for yourself. Observe how many drinks people have at social gatherings. Record it in your journal - watch how they act. Are they able to hold a conversation prior to drinking? If not, there’s a problem. Do this a few times and I think you’ll be surprised.

Hello and welcome to the lecture where we talk about your partner. I strongly suggest that if you have a partner you have them watch this lecture with you. If you are single, well you can choose. You can either skip this lecture but I find that even single people find this part helpful because if you’re dating you’ll know what to look for in a partner.

I am going to start off by saying that if you have a partner that drinks or is not willing to give up alcohol when they are around you, getting sober will be 95% harder for you. It is so important and I mean so critically important that your partner is there to support you and does not drink around you, or gives it up entirely. If they are not willing to, I am here to tell you that you will need to have the strongest will power in the world or you may need to take a break for a few months until you can stabilize yourself.

In the last lecture I asked you to observe other people. This does not exclude you observing your partner’s drinking habits but the difference is, I want you to be open with your partner. It’s important to have strong communication skills so your partner knows exactly how hard this is going to be for you and having their support can mean the difference of obtaining full sobriety or not. Most people who do not have supportive spouses fail.

One thing you are going to want to evaluate is whether or not your partner has a problem too. IF they don’t have a problem then not drinking will be easy for them. They’ll be able to not drink around you or give it up completely. If they have a problem, it might not be that easy for them and then perhaps, you should try and get sober together. If they’re not ready to get sober but you are, don’t give up on yourself. Take a break, get some distance, and when you are strong and able, you can go back to help them. We’ll talk more about that in another lecture.

For this lecture - your action item: is your partner on board or not? If not, are you ready to take a break - get some distance for a few months. Take some time to figure this out. See you in the next lecture.

I want to talk to you about society and I want you to think about how your culture is going to play a role in your drinking. When you first stop drinking alcohol you are going to think that everything and everyone revolves around drinking and what you see and feel is absolutely true. The concept of this entire course is to help you get to a place where you can detach yourself from other people and their habits. I want you to think of it like this. You are a person. You weren’t born with a drinking habit. Somehow your drinking started to take over and you became that person who drinks. Now think about the two things as separate things. There’s the you when you were drinking and there’s the real you.

When you stop drinking you will eventually get back to the real you. Now think about how you socialize with your friends and family. You want them to know and love the real you right? Not the intoxicated you even if the intoxicated you was more fun and outgoing. The intoxicated you though is not who you really are which means if you can only socialize with people while intoxicated those relationships are not real.

Now think about how other people interact with you. If they are always intoxicated then you are not knowing the real them. So what good is it having fake relationships?

As you work through this course I really want you to keep thinking about this.

A way to start making changes is to change the times of day you socialize with people so you won’t be tempted to pick up the drink. For example, if you have a best friend who you know starts to drink around 5pm every day, make it a point to visit or catch up before 5pm. If you are invited to a family gathering where everyone is drinking, create an early excuse before the gathering even starts. You might say, “Oh I can pop in for about an hour but I have other plans that start at 2pm.” It’s important that you start making subtle changes now because it takes a while to get from point A to point B. Point A being you have stopped drinking alcohol and Point B being you can anywhere and be around anyone without feeling triggered to drink.

If you spend a lot of time at the bar, this is going to be a challenge. I want you to start scaling down. If you have stopped drinking, ideally you should never step foot into a bar again. But, if you’re still scaling back and haven’t stopped completely you should start by making sure you are setting goals for yourself. For example, if you normally go to the bar or pub 3 times per week try for only 2 this week and then 1 next week.

Now, in the future you will get a point where if someone invites you to the bar or pub you may be able to go but you’ll want to be sure the reason you are going is for something other than drinking. (maybe a birthday celebration or a family gathering) Never again should you go to a bar for the sole purpose of drinking. That’s not going to be your life anymore.

By the end of this course you are going to learn how to fulfill those times with more meaningful things and people you won’t even like the idea of going to a bar.

And last, I want to talk to you about moderation. Moderation may be a short stint while you are detoxing (which by the way should not last more than a month) but if you have a drinking problem there is no such thing as moderation. You won’t see or hear me talk about it at all in this course because it doesn’t exist. We’ve already established that you do have a drinking problem (or else you would not have purchased this course) and anyone with a problem will never succeed with moderation. It’s too much of a slippery slope and there are too many gray areas. There’s no fine line that makes the distinction between drinking in moderation vs too much. Whereas, what I teach and that’s abstinence - there is a definite find line. IT’s very clear. You either take a drink or you don’t.

Hello and welcome to our next unit- the psychological impacts of drinking. Remember in the first unit when i asked you to think back and remember your own childhood? I asked you to remember how the first time being drunk made you feel? Now for some, you may not have liked it and for others you may have. Overtime though, either way, you continued to drink. There was something about it that made you keep going back.

For many kids who start drinking, they like the way alcohol loosens them up so they can be more social. But what about when that feeling starts to wear off? Why do you think people continue to keep drinking? There always seems to be that lost connection between teen drinking (or early adult - depending on when you started) to the time you notice it as a habit.

Alcohol is mentally, emotionally, and physically addicting. Mentally, you are trying to solve a problem. Emotionally, it makes you feel better and physically because you can die if you stop cold turkey.

Here’s what I want you to do. I want you to think of a problem you are having in your life right now. How does alcohol contribute to that problem? Does your partner think you drink too much? Are you having financial problems but blow your money on booze? Are you having work problems because you’re not thinking straight?

Now I want you to think about how alcohol helps that problem? It absolutely has to help that problem in some way or else you wouldn’t drink at all. Maybe it helps you temporarily forget about the problem or maybe it helps you loosen up with your partner. Perhaps it gets rid of your physical withdrawal symptoms.

Now take that same problem and think about how alcohol makes it worse. Do you have hangovers that keep you from being a good parent? Do you spend too much money on alcohol or do you get angry with people you shouldn’t?

Now keep thinking of that same problem. Does the good (meaning how alcohol solves the problem) outweigh the bad (how alcohol makes it worse) probably not. Now think about that same problem and write down in your journal how not drinking alcohol can solve or eliminate the problem all together.

You see, you are being tricked but only temporarily. Your mind is tricking you into remembering or thinking or chasing the good feeling so you don’t have to deal with the problem you are having. And while it may temporarily help you forget, it doesn’t solve that problem, It only makes it worse.

Once you come to this realization, you will have no choice to but to think about that every single time you decide to take a drink. When you start to force yourself to think about that, you will no longer enjoy the initial experience of taking that drink. The thoughts will be overbearing and hopefully strong enough to make you think twice about drinking the next time. If there is no reward, your body will start to reject the urges. See you in the next lecture.

In this lecture I want to talk to you about professional help. I’m not talking about professional help for your alcohol addiction because if you wanted to seek out a traditional rehab you wouldn’t be here - and keep in mind - I am a professional so take for what it’s worth. Since we’re talking about the psychological impacts of alcohol in this unit I want to talk to you about your mental health.

You see there is something in the addiction field that is called a co-occurring disorder. Now if you’re into labels which I’m guessing many of you are not, but if you are - if you go see a mental health professional for your alcohol problem you would likely be diagnosed with something called substance use disorder. It’s basically any and all chemical dependency addictions.

There’s another term called co-occurring disorder. A co-occurring disorder is when you have a substance use disorder and something else like depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and so on.

I want to talk to you about that being a high possibility and what to do. You see, it’s impossible for many people to understand if their addiction was caused by a mental health disorder or if their mental health disorder was caused by the addiction. It’s like the chicken or the egg theory. Many people use substances to help them alleviate symptoms of a mental disorder and on the flip side, many people who become addicted start showing signs and symptoms of something else - a deeper issue that had not yet been discovered.

If you are experiencing symptoms and believe you have a mental health struggle like depression or anxiety, it’s critical that you treat your mental health at the same time. People who struggle with their mental health rarely succeed at sobriety. I don’t want you to fail or get down on yourself for something you cannot control. I want you to be able to be free from alcohol and the only way to do that is to make sure you are getting the right help you need.

If you believe you are suffering from a mental health disorder, I urge you to make an appointment with a counselor or therapist to be screened. You may need therapy or medication. If you can tackle both things at the same time, your chances for sobriety will be so much greater. So if you know that the only thing you struggle with right now is alcohol, continue on. If you are not sure or if you have been diagnosed in the past, please make an appointment with a therapist. Your path, your sobriety, is counting on you to do this. See you in the next lecture.

In this unit I want to talk about what you can do if you find yourself in a crisis. Alcohol causes drama - it does. In addition, there may be other things going on in your life that you may not be prepared for. People tend to deal with crises differently. Some people can truck right along while others may be more sensitive. Considering you are going through an extremely challenging point in your life it is important to prepare yourself for what lies ahead.

Let’s say you’re a week sober and you get a call that somebody close to you passes away. Or, let’s say you are a month sober and you lose your job or you find out your spouse has cheated on you. Car accidents, family feuds, births, natural disasters, fires, evictions and the list goes on and on. How are you going to deal with that?

While most people with an alcohol addiction would pick up the bottle to try and get through the tough times, I don’t want you to do that. In fact, I want you to remember this lecture and remember everything you say or commit to if something in your life goes in an unplanned way.

The first thing you need to do is never say never. These things happen and it is likely you will experience some sort of crisis while trying hard to obtain sobriety. ONce you realize that something can and may happen to you, you will be so much more prepared if the time comes.

In your workbook I have made spaces for you to fill in the blanks and after this lecture I want you to pause the course and take some time filling this out.

First, I want you to think about your initial actions during a crisis. Besides alcohol, what has worked for you in the past? Do you prefer talking to someone over the phone, texting, taking your mind off things by going to the gym, praying or meditating, screaming in a pillow?

You must tackle the crisis head on but what comes next?

Having someone there is very important but each support person in your life may play a different role in each situation. I want you to think of three people you can call or text during a crisis and write their names down.

Now that you have three personal people in your life you know you can count on, I want you to find some local crisis hotlines in your area and write those numbers down. In the middle of a crisis you won’t be wanting to do the research so you need to do it now. Try to find three if you can.

Next, I want you to write down the phone numbers of people you may use for professional help. If you have a counselor or therapist, be sure to write their number. Remember, if you are feeling suicidal and think you may act on the urge to kill yourself, please call emergency (911 in the US.)

Last, I want you to make a list of things that you can do for distraction. Watch a movie, go for a workout, write a poem. Do you have any hobbies such as photography or gardening? Whatever those things are - write them down.

It’s important to print this page and hang it up somewhere or put it somewhere easily accessible. Follow those steps and count on your supports to help you through. Do whatever it takes to not resort to relapse. See you in the next lecture.

In this Unit I am going to show you exactly what you need to do to stop drinking alcohol. The first thing you are going to want to figure out is whether or not you are okay to quit cold turkey or do you need to gradually stop. I NEVER recommend quitting cold turkey unless you are not physically dependent on alcohol. If you are physically dependent on alcohol you need to come up with a taper down plan or you will need to be medically monitored at a detox facility. You can die if you quit cold turkey so please do not do that.

You can start by reducing the number of drinks you have in one night until you get to one drink per night. ONce you get to one drink per night you can skip a night and drink every other day. Once you know your body can handle it, skip two nights and then three. Once you are able to go three nights without drinking then try and stop all together. If you find yourself physically withdrawing, ie: shakes, nauseousness, severe headache, then take one drink, just enough to make it go away and keep going until you are no longer experiencing a physical withdrawal. It’s important to listen to your body and it’s also important not to confuse physical withdrawals with emotional withdrawals.

Now some of you may be weekend binge drinkers and want to stop. This is where I recommend going cold turkey because if you are able to go more than a couple of a days without drinking, it is not likely your body is dependent.

Either way, listen to your body, get medical help if you need it and start tapering down now so you can set your quit date. See you in the next lecture.

This is the lecture where you are going to start thinking about your quit day and before you move on with the course you will have a date selected.

Setting a date can be tricky and it won’t be the same for everyone. If you are not physically dependent - meaning you don’t drink every day and you don’t experience withdrawal symptoms - then there are no limitations on when you set your date, however you’ll want to listen to this entire lecture before doing so.

If you are physically dependent, then it will be critical to think about whether or not you will need to be medically monitored or if you are able to taper down. If you go to a medically monitored detox facility they will give you medication to get you through the detox. If you taper down, the process can take much longer. I am here to tell you which is better as I want you to decide. IF you’re in a hurry to stop then of course, go to detox. YOu can just google alcohol detox and the name of your city and you should be able to find one. They may cost money and there may be a waitlist. Typically, pregnant women and those addicted to alcohol or barbiturates are put toward the top of the list.

Once you decide how you want to detox or if you don’t need to detox you will need to plan before your quit date.

I want you to think of a time where the good things in your life will be minimally affected. If you have a big work presentation to tend to or other important things you may need to think about that. Would it be better to quit before or after those things?

Let’s say you know you have a wedding to attend in 6 months and normally you get really drunk and embarrass yourself and you don’t want that to happen again. If you quit too close to the event you will be putting yourself in a bad situation because sobriety will be so new. You’ll need a few months under your belt before being able to confidently say no to alcohol when everyone else is drunk.

Let’s say you have a work presentation next week and don’t want to have the shakes during the presentation then you may want to wait until the presentation is over. You see your quit date should be carefully calculated. You will need time to prepare which we will talk about in the next lectures but for now, think about a wide open space you may have where you can say okay today is the day!

If you are tapering down you’ll need a specific plan that is specific to you. Let’s say you want to get rid of one drink per night every few days. Then calculate that until you can get to zero and set your quit date to that.

Okay so check your calendar and start looking now. Before you go on to your next lecture, set the date and write it down. If by the end of this course you need to change it then go ahead and change it but once the course is over I want you to stick to that date and tell everyone you can.

Prepare yourself for the negative people or the naysayers but if you tell people they will likely hold you accountable and you don’t want to disappoint yourself or your close supports.

In this lecture we’re going to talk about triggers and how to avoid them. Even if this is your first time quitting alcohol you likely know what triggers you to drink. If you’re not sure, then take some time over the next few days to try and uncover what it is that makes you feel like you need to take a drink. Something obviously triggers your first drink of the day and it may be trying to avoid a physical withdrawal. But what makes you drink the next drink and the next? Is it stress or just routine? What happens when you don’t drink? Do you feel shaky or get anxiety?

Some people feel like they need to drink to relax and while alcohol may ease some of the tension or help you relax, that feeling is only short. There’s always a come down, always. If you’re past hangovers and don’t think there’s a come down that is probably because your body knows that a drink is coming at a certain time. For example, if you drink every day at 5:00pm, what happens if you wait until 6:00pm? You’ll start to feel it I bet.

Triggers are unique to your own drinking lifestyle. If you are a habitual drinker you’ll be triggered by the routine and shakes but if you’re a weekend binge drinker then you may be triggered simply because it’s Friday night or you may feel pressured to go out and have a few drinks with your friends. Music, environment, smoking, people, those are all triggers.

My challenge to you is to come up with a few (go for 3) things that trigger you. Every single drinker has a trigger or they wouldn’t drink. Pay close attention or if you are currently not drinking then think back to your last drink and what was happening right before. Note this in your notebook and then make a plan. During your first few months of not drinking it’s important to avoid triggers all together. So don’t go out to a bar, don’t walk down the alcohol aisle at the grocery store, or whatever triggers you, make a plan to stay away. After a few months, you will learn how to integrate back and you will be so impressed because what once triggered you to drink, will eventually repulse you. But don’t risk putting yourself in that situation until you have a few good months of sobriety under your belt.

See you in the next lecture.

This lecture is about removing yourself from your situation. There are many things to consider when quitting alcohol. I am a big advocate for people wanting to get sober from home because I don’t believe you should have to give up everything you already have just to get sober. With that being said, it’s important to look at your surroundings and identify things that cause you to want to drink alcohol. If those things are changeable or removable then great. For example, someone might feel tempted to drink when they are bored. Well, we will talk about what to do instead in another lecture but being bored is something you can change. There are other things, however, that you have no control over. For example, if you live with someone who heavily drinks alcohol and is constantly asking you to drink with them, but not willing to acknowledge they may have a problem too, you can’t change that and I wouldn’t recommend trying either. You may have to remove yourself from that person until you are in a place where you know you are so strong you won’t ever be tempted. I know it’s complicated on the relationship piece especially when there are children involved, and a heartache certainly doesn’t help the situation. You have to look at your personal situation and try to make a change that is feasible. I am not saying you need to leave your family but maybe you need to distance yourself during drinking times.

A lot of people drink with their friends at bars or pubs. I am not here to tell you that you will never be able to go to a bar or pub with your friends again but I am here to tell you that you should never ever put yourself in that situation unless you know for 100% sure that you can say no. There is no specific time frame on this as every single person out there is different but I can certainly tell you that if you go out with your drinking friends within the first 90 days you are setting yourself for major failure.

We will talk about later in the course about how to gradually ease yourself back into society but for now, you need to avoid these situations. You need to avoid any situation that puts your sobriety at risk and I want you to think critically each time you do something about whether or not that action is going to cause you to want a drink. If there is even a 1% chance it will, don’t do it.

In this lecture we’re going to talk about changing up your routines. So what I want you to do is jot down your typical weekly routine in your workbook. Include weekdays and weekends. Then take a highlighter and highlight the drinking times.

Once you do that I want you to specifically study up on those drinking times and see if you can rewrite your weekly routine to fill those drinking times with something else entirely.

So for example, let’s say you drink every day when you get home from work. Your routine would look something like work 8-5 come home at 6, start drinking, eat dinner, watch TV. and go to bed after 5-6 drinks. I’m using this example, because it’s the most common but yours may be different. So think about in the previous lecture when we talked about triggers. Coming home from work may be a trigger. So perhaps you need to do something else right after work. Could you go for a run, swim, or join a gym? Maybe sit in your car and listen to music or meditate for 30-45 min before walking in the door. If it’s home that triggers you, then what can you do about your home environment? Maybe try to avoid TV if you normally drink while watching TV or if you normally eat dinner at 7pm, try eating dinner at 6pm or 8pm. Think really critically about this and try to think outside the box. While you may not think the time you eat dinner or what you watch on TV could be a trigger, if you are drinking while doing those things, please don’t rule it out.

Try playing a board game, walking your dog, or simply go to bed earlier.

Now if your schedule includes going to the bar every Wednesday or hitting up a dance club on Fridays, maybe poker on Saturdays - whatever it is, then think of things you can do instead. Try to find other interests. LIke going to a show, going to a movie, etc. Try googling what are things you can do in your city and I think you’ll be surprised how many things you can find that don’t always involve alcohol.

Now depending on what triggers you, you may want to do the opposite. If going out triggers you then stay home, If staying home triggers you then go out. This part won’t be easy but always remember this: time really does heal all wounds. In the beginning, these things you do may seem boring or lame compared to what it used to feel like when you were drinking but each sober day you have is a day closer to being able to appreciate life without alcohol. You will eventually have interests and hobbies and find joy in being present and clear headed. For now, this is just training your brain. Eventually, you won’t have to try so hard and doing things sober will feel normal and fun again. Until then, be the strongest person you can be and try hard to enjoy the moments. Go ahead and pause this lecture to work on your workbook and have fun with your new routines.

In this lecture we are going to talk about triggers. In our last unit we talked about how to avoid triggers but now i want to talk to you about what to do if you feel triggered and how to get out of it.

Your body is going to go through a lot both physically and mentally. This is a really big change and you are confusing the crap out of your brain and your other body organs. You may do all the right things to avoid a trigger and then out of the blue, you’re going to find yourself in a situation where you really want to drink so bad it’s going to hurt.

Believe it or not, your body will give you physical signs before a trigger is going to happen and it’s important to recognize those signs right away so you can either avoid or confront straight on. Some of these signs may be:

Anxiety, nervousness, sweating, anger, fear, frustration, loneliness

There are more signs that will be unique to you. You may not recognize it the first time but if you find yourself triggered try really hard to think back to the way you felt right before. Those are the warning signs that a trigger is about to happen. Once you know your own warning signs you can be better prepared.

But all the planning won’t eliminate your triggers 100% so if you find yourself feeling triggered, depending on how bad the trigger is, you may want to think about this as a crisis. Bye now you should have a strong crisis plan in place so you can refer to your workbook and start utilizing your plan and supports.

For this lecture I want you to see if you can remember or recognize your warning signs and have a plan in place on what to do.

So go ahead and refer to your notebook and start jotting down your plan. For example, if you’re feeling triggered or you have some warning signs that a trigger is going to happen you may want to try and do something physical like running or push-ups. Or your plan may be to take a shower and stay in the shower until the feeling goes away. Perhaps you can turn on your favorite tv show, or surf the web. Whatever you think would work for you, jot it down. You can always go back and change things in your workbook. Please refer back to this lecture every time you have a warning sign so you can note what the warning sign is and what worked for you as a distraction.

In this unit we will talk about what support you may need and in this lecture I want to talk to you about whether or not you may need a counselor or recovery coach.

We talked about having a co-occurring disorder in a previous lecture. So, if you do struggle with other mental health conditions you know that I stated that you must be getting treatment for that or sobriety will be close to impossible. It will be up to you if you talk to your mental health professional about addiction or not but at the bare minimum you should be receiving treatment.

Now if alcohol addiction is the only problem you are dealing with then it will be up to you to decide if you need additional support. I always recommend trying an at-home plan first because if it works then that is the best of all worlds. You save time, money and resources by doing it on your own. However, getting sober at home can be harder for some people. Not everyone can control their environment and some people just may need a little extra help.

If you find yourself not being able to get through detox or not being able to get through a couple of days without drinking no matter how hard you try, it may be wise to find a counselor who has experience in addiction to help further support you. That doesn’t mean that this plan won’t work. You see counseling alone isn’t likely to help. You will notice that all rehab facilities and programs utilize multiple approaches so this could be the plan you are working and you may just need a counselor to help tie it all together. Or, you can see if there are recovery coaches in your area that can help. A counselor is someone who helps people professionally and counsels them through their situations. A counselor may or may not have a past addiction problem and to be a counselor, that person needs to have specific training and education. Whereas, a recovery coach is usually someone who has struggled with addiction and is there to support others who are struggling with addiction. Recovery coaches work from their own personal experiences. There are pros and cons to both but consider one or both if you feel like you need a little more support. If you’re not sure where to start, start by googling addiction counselor or recovery coach and the name of your city.

You probably took this course because you did not feel it was right for you to attend a traditional rehab facility and prefer learning online. I want to talk to you about how you can find even more online support.

Remember, this course is your program and in order for this program to be successful you are going to need to find more support in all areas of your life. Previously, we talked about whether or not you need a therapist or mental health professional. We also talked about the benefits of having a counselor or recovery coach. Now I want to be sure you know where to go online so you can support right at your fingertips.

The online resources that you choose are going to be there for you 24/7. So here is what I recommend and I want you to add more online support in your workbook.

First, I recommend joining an online support group. You can find support groups by using google. If you prefer to join a local group so you can arrange to meet other people in person then that’s great. If not, that’s okay too. There are many support groups online - even reddit has one. So I want you to take the time to find one and join right away.

Second, I want you to join my secret facebook group. I have created a secret facebook group for those students who are enrolled in my course. I have a few courses out there but one thing is the same for all of my students. All of my courses are addiction focused.

The benefits to belonging to my secret facebook group is that because it’s secret, none of your facebook friends will know you belong to the group. You can strategize and connect with other students who are all going through the same thing. If you are interested in joining the secret group, please send me a private message on udemy and I will send you the link. The reason I don’t share the link is to cut down on spam. I personally make sure that every person in the group is in fact a real student.

And Last, in your spare time, read some recovery blogs. Again, you can google this and you’ll find hundreds of blogs out there. The reason I think it’s important to read recovery blogs is because I believe you are able to really relate to the bloggers and their experiences. You’ll also find some really inspiring stories. And who knows, you may have your own story to share one day.

Alright so go ahead and pause this lecture and take some time now to surf the internet and find some online support groups and recovery blogs to read.

In this lecture we are going to talk about how you can get back into society when everyone around you is drinking.

When you make the decision to stop drinking you don’t have a vision of total isolation. There are going to be many important times in your life that you will not want to miss out on because other people are drinking. Whether it’s a friend’s birthday, holiday party or family reunion you don’t want to miss out.

Relationships are important and if you are feeling left out, lonely or isolated you are at risk for a relapse.

Everybody has their own time frame on this and this is why getting sober at home can be more beneficial than attending a traditional rehab facility. You get to choose your own timeframes here.

So for starters, after you detox and while you are brand new to sobriety, it is important to avoid all situations where alcohol is involved. Remember how you planned your quit date? Be sure it doesn’t fall too close to something important to you like a wedding or a family get together that you just can’t miss.

Generally, I recommend giving it at least 30 days of total avoidance. Now some people may need longer while others may feel they can jump into it sooner. But here’s how you do it.

Start slow. At your first challenge - or what I mean this is your first invite to a situation that involves alcohol, only go for a predetermined amount of time and see how that goes. We talked in a previous lecture about having an excuse and this is the same idea. Start by stating you can attend but you have to leave at a certain time and be sure you follow through with it no matter how fun or confident you are feeling.

When you get home, refer back to your workbook and jot down how you felt. Did you experience any warning signs? Did you feel triggered? How long did you stay?

If you felt warning signs or you felt triggered you may need a little more time under your belt before attending another social event. Give it another couple of weeks and try again - for the same amount of time.

If you felt confident, no warning signs, and no triggers, then certainly accept another invite but be sure to put another end time. I recommend increasing the time by 30 minutes. So if your first event was set at one hour, this time try for 90 minutes and see how that goes. Each time, come back, reflect and again if there were no warning signs or triggers you can keep going by increasing your time by 30 minutes. Always, always put an end time even if you feel super confident. The key is to go slow and not get overconfident. If at any time, you feel warning signs or triggers then it’s important to take a step back and either take a couple weeks break or reduce your time out. For example, if you did great out at two hours but felt triggered at 2 ½ hours, then scale it back.

Another thing you can do, but be careful of this, is to offer to be a designated driver. Now, I don’t recommend doing this unless you feel like you have a group of friends or family who won’t take advantage of you. Being a designated driver should always be on your own terms so if you’re not comfortable doing it then just skip this piece of advice.

However, I think that sometimes being a designated driver holds you more accountable to being sure you don’t drink when you are out. So give it a try and see what you think.

You see, eventually, you are going to be able to go out with your friends or family and have a good time. The thing that will surprise you though is that you will find yourself feeling a little annoyed when everyone starts to drink heavily and you may feel like leaving when that happens. You will see how ridiculous people act and talk when they are drinking. You can laugh at them the next morning when you’re with the sun starting your day full of energy and they’re laid up in bed with a bad hangover. Overtime, you will wonder why you have drank to begin with. The thought of alcohol will repulse you and make you sick even.

Good luck out there and don’t forget to come back to your workbook after you’ve gone out.

I’m super proud of you for sticking with this course for so long. I know it’s a lot of information but trust me, you need it all to be successful. We only have a few more lectures left.

In this lecture I want to talk to you about what to do if you relapse. Now you have a choice, you can finish this lecture so you can be prepared and know ahead of time on what to do or if you feel more comfortable, you can skip this lecture, know that it’s here for the future, and if you have a relapse you can refer back to it.

Okay so this is where my approach is going to be drastically different then the approach that traditional rehabs or 12-step programs take. If you relapse, I strongly believe that it would be detrimental to think of it as a failure or that you have to start all over from scratch. You need all that work, so why not get credit for what you did do and what you accomplished? Why not just pick up where you left off. Well, if you have relapsed, you left off here.

So if you relapse it’s important to understand why you relapsed and what happened. So start with thinking back to the moment you picked up that first drink. Did you have any warning signs prior? Did something happen right before or was it going to happen regardless? What could you have done to prevent it? If you’re watching this and have recently relapsed, I want you to refer to your workbook and jot down some things you can do in the future to prevent exactly what happened. Maybe you ignored your warning signs or thought you could ignore the warning signs and be okay. Maybe you jumped back into society too soon or too fast - when you weren’t ready. Maybe you were stressed or feeling anxious. Also, note about how you felt, specifically about how you felt after. Was it worth it? Did you have a hangover? Whatever happened, don’t be too hard on yourself. It was a slip up and that’s okay. Just continue.

I don’t personally like keeping track of the days because I don’t want my students to feel like they have to start over if they relapse. If it’s a tiny relapse then don’t bother counting it. Learn from your mistake and move on. The faster you can move forward the less detrimental the relapse will be.

You are nearly there. This is our last lecture before our conclusion. In this unit I want to talk about your long term sobriety and what you can do to ensure lifelong success. In this lecture I’m going to talk about how and why you should give back and advocate for a cause related to alcohol. You see when you feel strongly about something and start to understand some underlying issues that people face you will be so much stronger in the end.

This part is really up to you but what I recommend is finding non-profit organizations you can support. Whether it’s donating to the cause or volunteering your time. Are keen on working with adolescents perhaps or maybe veterans? What population can you relate to most? Maybe it’s joining an organization that focuses on drunk driving or mother’s drinking while pregnant. You can blog, tell your story, apply to be on a board. Start to research some non-profit organizations and note your top three. What is it that you are good at? Maybe you’re good at technology and can offer to help create someone’s website. Maybe you’re good at politics? There’s a place for everyone.

Advocacy can be so powerful and so important. Without strong advocates there would be no change. Without change our society would never evolve. Good luck out there!

In this lecture I want to talk to you about how to help others. Alcohol addiction, as you know, is very debilitating and people need people to help them through. In our last lecture I talked about giving back in a big way and now I want to talk to you about giving back in a more personal way.

Do you know someone who is struggling with an alcohol addiction? Can you help someone in your online or in person support group? Can you become a mentor or a recovery coach? People who struggle with alcohol like to know that the person helping them has real life experience.

So this is our last lecture of the course. We have one more unit and that is the conclusion. In unit 10 I have made a list of resources that I think you may find helpful.

I’m very proud of you for powering through this course. If you have set your quit date. Post it to our discussion forum so the other students and I can cheer you on. See in the next unit where we wrap everything up.

Welcome to Day 1 of 30 days to sobriety success! We're talking nutrition and healthy eating + how it impacts recovery.

Mastering your mental health is day 2 of 30 days to sobriety success. The ability to regulate thoughts, emotions and staying mentally strong is what sets you up for long term success.

Most people don't realise just how much their family impacts their chances of a successful recovery. This is day 3 of 30 days to sobriety success.

Setting a quit date - is it really that important? YES! Find out why in day 4 of 30 days to sobriety success.

Ugh! The gym. It's the worst for most people but fitness is really important to a successful recovery. So, what can you do? Watch day 5 of 30 days to sobriety success.

Developing a deeper spiritual practice has been shown to support your addiction recovery journey. Watch day 6 of 30 days to sobriety success to find out more.

Sometimes your friend group can actually be really bad for your sobriety. Find out who the good friends and bad friends are and what to do about them in Day 7 of 30 Days to Sobriety Success.

Does everyone relapse? What you need to know! This is day 8 of 30 Days to Sobriety Success.

Did you know that work can be a major reason for struggling during sobriety? It's true! Welcome to day 9 of 30 Days to Sobriety Success.

You made it! This is day 10 of 30 days to sobriety success and we're talking about people, places and things. You're going to love this one!

Sleep. We all need it and chances are you aren't getting enough of it. But... did you know it impacts your sobriety? Watch more in Day 11 of 30 Days to Sobriety Success.

Intentional living is a powerful, powerful thing. It gives you complete dominion and domain over your life. Something you DEFINITELY need in sobriety. Day 12 of 30 Days to Sobriety Success.

If you want to succeed in being sober for the long term you have got to learn how to manage triggers like a FRIGGIN BOSS. You're watching day 13 of 30 Days to Sobriety Success.

What on earth does H.A.L.T. mean and why should you be paying attention to it? Find out in Day 14 of 30 Days to Sobriety Success

Wait...why does keeing your home clean make any difference to your ability to get and stay sober? Keeping your living space clean has plenty of benefits. Let's dive in to 30 Days of Sobriety Success Day 15

Sugar. Look it isn't great for you under normal circumstances but when you're suffering from addiction it can be easy to succumb to its dangers. We'll talk through what these are in Day 16 of 30 Days to Sobriety Success

In Day 17 of 30 Days to Sobriety Success, we're examining the powerful activity of journaling. I really recommend to everyone that they journal regularly and here are some reasons why!

You've got to be mentally prepared and ready for sobriety. It's hard work to get and stay in recovery so preparing a strong mind is key to your success.

Reading is a powerful way to up your personal understanding of life. Reading also helps you feel better too!

One persons crisis is not the same as another. So, how do you get crisis support in times of need? Who can you reach out to when your sober journey is under attack?

There are lots of ways to get help with your addiction and online addiction recovery programs have exploded thanks to the pandemic. But will an online support program actually help you?

Like the title of this video says, sometimes you just want to connect with someone in person. If that's you, then you need to do what is necessary to make that happen. It's crucial for your recovery so make an effort to ensure it becomes a reality.

Money. It's critically important in todays society and very important for anyone in recovery. Get your finances in order so you can start making real progress on your life goals.

Everyone today wants instant results. Social media has fueled us to believe that we can get everything we want in a short time. However, going slow and steady is the foundation of recovery from drug and alcohol or even porn abuse.

Grief comes in many different shapes and sizes. People often feel as though grief is just relegated to the loss of a loved one or a pet. Grief is actually more complex than that so let's dig in and find out how it affects addiction and recovery.

t's time to talk about how to be sober around drunk people and enjoy it. It's a hard topic to cover but you need to know what it will be like when you are having to spend time around other people who may be partaking in your addiction and you are in recovery.

Sobriety can be a dangerous thing - sometimes you find yourself trading one addiction for another. Find out why that's a potential problem in today's video. Don't forget to like and subscribe.

What is a dry drunk and how do you know if you are one? Here are some signs that you're actually dry drunk right now and what to do about it.

What's the point of being sober? We get asked this question ALL the time.

It's the final day of our 30 Days to Sobriety Success series and it's the most important one - TAKE ACTION! That's right - none of this means ANYTHING if you can't or won't take the action needed.