Speak to Win and Influence

Before we jump onto the emotional connection, let me give you a bit of an introduction about this Public Speaking Module. I love Einstein's quote: "Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler". In a way, that's what inspired me to create what I now call the Wheel of Public Speaking, which at a glance gives you an idea about the 4 key elements you have to develop to become an outstanding presenter/public speaker/orator/Tedx Speaker...

Depending on where you wish to direct your public speaking efforts, there might be certain peculiarities, but regardless, you will need to work on the emotional connection you build with the audience, the content you deliver and how you deliver it through your body language and the way in which you manage your state before, during and after the presentation. Master those 4 elements and you will become a memorable, persuasive and inspiring speaker at work, in front of a huge audience, at your best friend's wedding; no matter the place, the stage will always be yours.

Throughout this module, I will break down each of those elements and together we'll dive deeper into the art of public speaking. You are in for a treat, so grab your energy, dreams, motivation, goals, stories and your amazing brain and let's have a great time.

Every time we are in front of an audience and begin to communicate, the first thing that we are conveying at an unconscious level is our emotions. Have you ever watched a speaker feeling uncomfortable and all of a sudden you are feeling very similar and even feel sorry for them?

Or a sales presentation done by someone who doesn't transmit that level of certainty and trust you need to, later on, invest in their product?

I can give you tons of examples. A more positive one, when the speaker is very energised and passionate about the topic and you end up replicating the same state and feelings?

The bottom line is that if we are going to speak, it's important that we are mindful about our state before we get on the stage because it will be the difference between an amazing talk or presentation and a very lousy one.

If you now came and asked me, Jose, what would you recommend I do to create the emotional connection I intend for my talk or presentation? My answer would be, stick around for the rest of this training, but initially, I would advise you to follow my 4-7 second rule.

I'm curious about what you will be doing next to become a more passionate speaker. Please share your strategies with us on the comments' box.

-START SPEAKING PASSIONATELY TO TRAIN THE MUSCLE-

Follow me on this quick routine:

• Think of a time when you felt passion for something, anything. Relive the feeling in your mind, notice what you see, hear and experience overall.

• Pay attention to how your body language changes, notice how you stand and breathe differently, speak and notice the tone of your voice. Gesture and move while holding this feeling of passion.

• Now you can invoke passion inside out (thinking about it) and vice versa (replicating the body language you've just experienced).

• If you have a presentation coming up, rehearse it with the above body language and enjoy the difference.

• Finally, I invite you to watch Jill Bolte Taylor's TED: My stroke of insight. This is a version of passion. What is yours?

More on this in the first module (Mindset) of my training program.

Get to know the people you are you going to be building the emotional connection with upfront.

Do you have your topic yet?

-Exercise-

Craft a fairy tale or a superhero story that describes how you would like the life of your dreams to be. It can also be about how you would like an area of your life to be different. Make it about anything you like. Use your imagination and enjoy the process. Once the story is ready, pull out your phone and film yourself. You can then give yourself feedback or ask a friend or colleague to share their opinion.

"Your number-one mission as a speaker is to take something that matters deeply to you and to rebuild it inside the minds of your listeners. We’ll call that something an idea".

-Chris J. Anderson-

Regardless of whether you are speaking at TED, delivering a business presentation or sharing your thoughts at a small gathering, the above quote from Chris Anderson still applies. As presenters, we have a responsibility to leave people better off. When we speak, we are building an idea, creating images, changing perception and injecting feelings into our audience's minds. And if you are reading this, I hope you agree and use this knowledge to improve people's lives as well as your life. We all carry our own excellence within us and my goal is to enable you to speak up and share it with the world. Be selfless and give out some of that excellence to others.

Whether you already have your connecting theme or not, I think the following questions can be very useful to either create it or polish it further.

• Remember our friend passion? Well, guess what, it's the first on the list. How passionate are you about your topic?

• Will it have a positive impact on people's lives (your audience)?

• Is the information you are sharing already out there? Most importantly, how unique is your take on the topic? Is it original?

• Will it inspire people to think and take action?

• How is the ocean you and your theme are swimming in, red (full of speakers doing the same) or blue? Think about ways in which you can stand out even within a red ocean.

• Do you have enough stories, analogies and examples to illustrate the points you want to make during your presentation?

• How about time? Remember that in many occasions less is more. The mind can only process and remember so much (Module 1 of this training course).

• How much do I know about the topic to make it worthwhile for the audience?

• Do I have a credible background to take on this theme?

• Can I encapsulate the theme of my talk or presentation in fifteen words? And if I do, how compelling is the message?

The above can be applied to any scenario. Think about it, you can ask yourself the same questions to prepare for a dissertation, business presentation or a TEDx.

Next time you present your business to any audience, even if it's a presentation you've done many times before, take yourself through the above questions and give the same old presentation a new fresh and unique flare that honours your audience's time.

Throughout our presentation, we are creating and maintaining an emotional connection with the audience. During the first few seconds this connection depends on our nonverbal communication and internal emotions, after that it becomes a combination of the previous plus the words we use, and believe me, choosing what to say can make or break your whole speech or presentation.

The Venn diagram available to download is based on research done on TED talks, which showed that some of the most popular presentations consisted of approximately 65% pathos, 25% logos and 10% ethos.

Here is a good exercise for you. Take one of your recent presentations and allocate the content into one of the three categories we've just covered. How does your pathos stack up against the rest? If your emotional appeal is minimal, you may want to think again about your content, like adding more stories, analogies, metaphors, anecdotes and personal insights. I recommend you do this before you give this presentation again.

"No one can remember more than three points".

- Philip Crosby -

The 3 Key Elements of your Presentation Map:

1. The Audience Takeaway: Ask yourself, "What would you like the audience to know about you, your product or service, brand, idea at the end of your talk/presentation?" Try to make it as concise as possible, since it could become the title for your talk.

2. Your main three messages/points: As explained in module 1, the mind can only process so much information in short-term memory. Thinking, speaking and listening are physically demanding activities. When in the audience you are actively thinking and listening which are very exhausting because you are continually adding information to be remembered later. This causes what's known as conscious overload or cognitive backlog. The longer your presentation, the more you will be demanding from your audience. When creating your presentation, as a rule of thumb, allocate 5-6 minutes per message/point. This will also help you condensing the information to make sure you deliver the essence and very best.

3. The meat of your presentation: This is when you bring in the stories, statistics, examples and rest of information to support and illustrate your points. Here you will be using MAPTAS/TASMAP, Aristotle's persuasion components (Ethos, Logos, Pathos) and will make sure it all links back to your "Connecting Theme".

In section 2, I asked you to think of a topic you would love to speak about.

Now with that topic in mind, start creating your presentation map, using everything you've learned so far.

You walk onto the stage, nervous, your hands are sweaty and your legs shaking, the spotlight is right on your face and you begin to speak.

As your presentation evolves, something very strange takes place. The initially serious and quiet audience begins to open up, to laugh and interact with you. There is something else happening though. Rich, neurologically encoded patterns of information from your mind are somehow being copied across onto the audience's mind, impacting their view of the world and most likely their behaviours. This is human-to-human communication being amplified by the ancient art of Public Speaking, which is wired deeply into our brains.

There are many sayings and quotes about the importance of sharing stories to deliver your message:

• Facts tell, stories sell.

• People talk in stories, and so must we - Luke Sullivan.

• A story is a trick for sneaking a message into the fortified citadel of the human mind - Jonathan Gottschall

• Marketing is no longer about the stuff that you make but about the stories that you tell - Seth Godin.

• When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion - Dale Carnegie.

Yes, stories are key, and next, we are going to look at how to create and share them successfully.

The world's best speakers never write a speech in a linear fashion. These professionals use a system developed over 50 years ago by The Father of Professional Speaking, Bill Gove, called "the vignette system". A vignette is a mini-story comprised of an example in story form. Each vignette has a premise, a problem and a payoff and it has the ability to stand on its own as an entire speech, if you wish to. Some of the best vignettes are made up of personal humorous stories delivered as illustrations of the point you are making. You can also create vignettes using other person's stories, successful businesses' and even fairy tales. For example, when I speak about purpose in business, I always like to share the story of TOMS®, a shoe manufacturer that donates $1 for every $3 they make. Feel free to pick the story that best highlights your point.

As described above, a vignette is comprised of a premise, a problem and a payoff or in my model, an introduction, a problem and a solution. In very plain terms, beginning, middle and end.

For example, people tend to say to me that I look very confident and can't imagine that I may have ever struggled to speak in front of an audience (intro). Of course, I did, things weren't always as they are today, I struggled and even left presentations half-finished due to my lack of confidence (problem). That's one of the reasons why I decided to enrol on different training courses because I promised myself I would never go through that situation again. My TEDx was at the time the result of an exciting journey that allowed me once more to realise and appreciate how far I've come (solution).

Download the IPS "U" model.

-ADVANCED TIPS-

• Once you have your vignette, I would recommend that you time it, memorise it and file it for future presentations. Professional speakers and presenters don't tend to rehearse their entire talks; they rehearse their vignettes and then connect them together based on the length and content of their speech.

• It's important that you test your mini-stories in front of live audiences to gain feedback and to make the necessary adjustments that will turn them into great. I also invite you to record yourself and to share your mini-stories with friends and family to test them. The more you test and hone them, the more powerful they will become.

• Finally, instead of sitting down and writing out your 15 or 45 minutes talk all in one go, build the habit of keeping a journal with you, and when you have some inspiration time, begin writing vignettes that drive home a specific point. Compile them into a log and then when you need the right story for the session or presentation you are creating, it will be there waiting for you. This is a master tip from Steve Siebold, a world-renowned financial expert, professional speaker and author of "How Rich People Think."

I didn't understand what Jamie's business did until he shared the story of one of his customers. In very basic terms, he had created an online platform to help people with their financial planning. Why didn't you start with the story, I asked?

Quoting Einstein again: “Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.” Why not do the same when you present yourself and/or your business?

Think about it this way, the more people understand and remember what you do, the more likely they will be to use and recommend your services.

One of my clients was an SEO consultant, she attended one of my workshops and I met her at a networking event a few days later to be surprised by her amazing elevator pitch. She had cleverly combined her blogging passion with what her business did in a very flowy narrative that finished by showing how successfully her blog was ranking thanks to her SEO skills.

Sometimes having a memorable phrase can also add an interesting twist. "Sometimes you lose, sometimes you learn". Another way to grab attention can be to start with a question. Has your boss ever asked you to "whip up a quick report before the end of the day"?

There are many angles to it and I invite you to experiment. However, always take into account:

• What is the expected outcome of your elevator pitch? Ideally, it should be to prompt a second conversation.

• Who is it for?

• What's in it for them?

• It should only come at someone else’s prompting.

Did you know that at least 80% of where you are today in life is down to your communication skills? Which means that whatever success you seek, 80% of it will depend on your ability to connect and influence others. So, from "0" to "10" where would you say your communication skills are in relation to the goals you want to achieve?

And regardless of where they are, I can help you get them to 10 and even 20 if you wish!

This is what I do. I help people succeed through the power of advanced communication skills.

In case you were wondering what one of my pitches would look like. This one I tend to use at conferences and networking events when I get asked to stand up and share what I do.

Wrap-up and final thoughts!

• Start creating your vignettes and keep them in your journal. I personally have a folder with notes on my phone.

• Record yourself and ask others for feedback.

• Do the pub test, not the quiz. Next time you meet your friends, share some of your stories and notice how people react.

• Get into the habit of appealing to all the senses with your stories.

• Apply the 80/20 principle to your vignettes (80% true / 20% embellish).

Begin to bring your newly crafted stories into your presentation map.

As explained previously, there are three commonly understood elements in any face-to-face human communication: words, tone of voice and body language. The first category, the words, is known as verbal communication, and the last two categories, tone of voice and body language, are known as nonverbal communication; the focus of this section.

The way in which we use these nonverbal elements will have a direct impact on how the audience understands the feelings, attitude, or intent behind our communication.

Imagine the Managing Director of the business you work for starting his year-end speech by saying: "It's been a fantastic year."

Yet, his body stance and the rise and fall of his voice indicate, "it's been a terrible year."

At this point, the audience is around 10 times more likely to trust the perceived meaning of the message coming from your MD's nonverbals. They will not trust words over the voice and body. Basically, we believe it, when we see it.

So, what do you say if we now learn the nonverbals that will allow you to win and positively influence any audience?

As American poet William Carlos Williams quoted: "It's not what you say that matters but the manner in which you say it; there lies the secret of the ages." This may suggest that content is not so king after all, but in my experience, and as Albert Mehrabian (professor emeritus of psychology, UCLA) found in some of his studies, to produce effective and meaningful messages, the words, sound and body need to support one another. In the presence of any incongruency, the receiver of the message trusts predominantly nonverbal cues (our voice 38% + Physiology 55%) rather than the potential literal meaning of the words (verbal 7%).

The most critical time of a speech or presentation is the opening. This is when you either win or lose your audience's attention. Therefore, engaging with the correct verbal and nonverbal communication is essential.

-IMPORTANT-

Make sure there are no discrepancies between what you convey verbally and nonverbally. Similar to the previous example of the MD. If it's been a great year, don't just say it, show it.

When there is lack of congruence in our communication, our audience will be more likely to trust what they see over what's being said. Great communicators are congruent and so cause less confusion or cognitive dissonance. Congruence in communication wins trust.

When first presenting, people often wonder what to do with their hands because they can sometimes have a life of their own and can be distracting for the audience. Do we put them in our pockets, hold them by our sides, hide them behind our backs?...

The answer is none of the above.

To make sure you know what to do and feel comfortable while doing it, I'm going to introduce you to an adaptation to public speaking of the Satir Communication Styles / Category Patterns. These five nonverbal styles are specific postures and gestures that involve your entire body (including your hands) and your tonality.

I know you will remember this next time you jump on the tube. Play with your eyebrows and share your experience with us on the comments' box  ?

Enjoy this amazing theatrical technique designed to alter the pace of the speech to captivate your audience.

A quick word of advice. Use it sensibly because otherwise, it can have the opposite effect. In my early days, my colleagues used to call me a drama queen due to the excessive use of the Pause-Scan-Nod-Whisper technique.

If you are wondering where to look while delivering your presentation or talk, the following points of communication will provide you with some guidance that will enable you to look natural on the stage while keeping your audience super engaged.

In addition to the above:

• How is the presentation you started in section two coming along? What can you add to it knowing what you now know?

Some additional tips:

• For mouth breathers: Close your mouth at the end of your sentences.

• Keep your mouth hydrated to avoid Smacking.

• It is recommended that you bring your breathing down to your belly, since breathing up in the chest can send fight or flight unconscious signals to the audience. I personally do this by taking a deep breath (counting to 5 elephants) and on the exhale I do the same again (1 elephant, 2 elephants...).

"The success of your presentation will be judged not by the knowledge you send but by what the listener receives".

-Lilly Walters-

If our presentation will be judged by what our listeners receive, what else is there to do to create an unforgettable experience for them and to assure our message lands the way we would like it to?

Everything that we have covered until this point will enable you to achieve this. However, we can always do better, right?

On this section I will share some advanced tips that you can begin to incorporate into your stories and presentations right away, and trust me, they will take your speaking skills to a new level.

-IMPORTANT-

• How is the presentation you started back in section 2 progressing?​

• Next question: How can you hone it using the elements presented in this section?

"You have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength".

-Marcus Aurelius-

Congratulations for all your time and effort. You have come to the last section of not only this module but the whole program, well done. You are an outstanding communicator and I encourage you to continue practising, improving and growing with every human interaction.

On this section, I'm going to teach you some of my favourite techniques, which combine different areas of knowledge:

• NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming)

• Visualisation techniques

• Stress management tools

• Advanced learning methods

During this exercise, your mind will not know that the events you are thinking about are not actually happening and yet you will start to feel positive and confident. You can also choose to be relaxed, happy, motivated, because the process is exactly the same. Remember that we are what we repeatedly do, so the more you repeat the feeling of confidence, the more you are developing your confidence muscle and turning it into a habit.

How was that? (The exercise).

-TOP TIP FOR GROWING THE MUSCLE-

Pick events from your past when you felt VERY confident and positive. If you can’t think of multiple occasions you can use the same time more than once, it will work just as well, and don’t worry if this tool has not worked for you straight away. If this is the case, you simply need to practice it a few more times. Our muscles all develop and stretch in their own time, they just need consistency and patience, so keep going. I promise it’s worth it.

Visualisation techniques have been used by successful people to visualise their desired outcomes for ages. The practice has even given some high achievers what seems like super-powers, helping them create their dream lives by accomplishing one goal or task at a time with hyper focus and complete confidence. In fact, we all have this awesome power, but most of us have never been taught to use it effectively. Elite athletes use it. The super-rich use it. And peak performers in all fields now use it. That power is called visualisation. The daily practice of visualising your dreams as already complete can rapidly accelerate your achievement of those dreams, goals, and ambitions.

"Whatever we plant in our subconscious mind and nourish with repetition and emotion will one day become a reality".

- Earl Nightingale -

The room technique is an adaptation from some memory techniques that I've learned in the past, which works really well to memorise the main structure of your talk. However, it becomes even more powerful when you combine it with the vignettes (mini-stories) system you've already learned.

You will never go back to writing a shopping list after this ?

This really is a happy ending!​

You have just completed the third module (Public Speaking) of my signature training program. Module 1 is all around Mindset and Module 2 Communication 1-2-1. Check them out.

It's been an incredible pleasure to be on this journey with you. You are now part of an elite group of outstanding communicators and I can only wish you the greatest success.

Practise and apply all that you have learned and stay tuned, because I will continue to release more amazing material around Mindset, Communication and Public Speaking.

I invite you to connect with me on Instagram, Facebook and LinkedIn.

All the best,

Jose Ucar