What happens between parents and children matters. Through our parenting we shape the lives of our children and prepare them to become happy and successful adults and positive contributors to society. Therefore, learning the skills of effective parenting will be one of the most worthwhile ventures you ever pursue.
Yet, doing this work is not easy
Although rewarding, there is frankly little that is as hard as raising children. Family life is chaotic. Children come into the world helpless and are totally dependent on their parents for all their care. The process of growing physically and emotionally is a slow journey that takes many years. In the meantime, children make incredible emotional and physical demands on their parents. These demands require an abundance of understanding, patience, perseverance, dedication, even emotional maturity.
During the course I’m going to talk about many of the challenges that come at us almost daily. For example, what do you say or do when?
· Your kids bicker and fight.
· They are unmotivated and don’t want to help around the house.
· A child consistently lies.
· Your son or daughter brings home a really bad report card.
· A daughter is devastated by the remarks of some friends and becomes very depressed.
· Your son pitches a major fit when his screen time is over.
These are just a few of the myriad of challenges that we face as parents every day.
The mistakes we make as parents
Such challenges set us up to do one of two things: We over-manage our children by controlling, directing, lecturing, forcing, telling, nagging, criticizing, threatening. Or, we overindulge them (make life easy) by sympathizing, giving in, rescuing, fixing or doing for our them what they ought to do for themselves. Either way, our children fail to learn from their experiences or grow in emotional maturity and self-responsibility.
Who Am I?
Hi, my name is Roger Allen. I’m a psychologist, author, coach, consultant, teacher, and more importantly, a father and grandfather. I’ve studied parenting and family relationships for 30 plus years and have developed a set of basic principles and skills to help you create loving relationships with your children and empower them to become responsible, emotionally mature children and adults. The principles and skills I will teach you have been tested with thousands of people throughout the world.
My overall purpose, in this parenting course, is to teach you principles and skills to create a nurturing climate in your home. This is a home which blends the qualities of love and compassion with clear expectations and accountability. Most parents are good at one or the other—creating a loving, responsive environment but not so good at setting expectations. Or the other way around. They’re good at setting expectations but not good at compassion and love. I’m going to teach you to do both—hold high standards and yet create a safe and loving environment.
Here's what we’ll do
In the first part of the course, I’ll create a framework of successful parenting by helping you understand the basic principles or characteristics of a nurturing home. By understanding these principles you’ll become less reactive and become far more knowledgeable what to do and say to not only solve problems but help you children learn and grow.
Most of the course is about improving how you communicate and interact with your children. I’ll present a model (I call it the Key Moment Model) that will help you learn to communicate in ways that are positive and strengthening to your children rather than weakening and harmful to them and your relationships.
The remaining lessons are all about specific strategies and communication skills. You’ll learn how to:
· Establish loving authority within your home.
· Open up communication and build trust.
· Build an atmosphere of harmony rather than criticism, bickering and putdowns.
· Resolve disagreements and conflicts constructively and without power struggles.
· Give up parenting habits that destroy self-esteem and weaken relationships.
· Teach your children to assume responsibility for their feelings and actions.
· Set limits and enforce discipline without being heavy handed.
This course is not theory. I teach very concrete skills (what to do and say when such and such an event occurs in your home) and then demonstrate the skills with examples of communication between parents and their children.
The skills not only work but are immediately useful. By learning and practicing them you will improve the way you parent so you can enjoy your children and positively influence their development. I have been teaching these principles and skills for many years and I am pleased to make them more widely available in this course.
Here’s just a small sampling of what my students are saying
"In my career as a specialist providing treatment to adolescents and their families, I have seen many parenting theories, models and books but nothing which rises to the stature of this work by Dr. Allen." Michael E. Berrett, Ph.D., Psychologist, nationally known clinical teacher, and CEO of Center for Change
“The best course ever... I do not regret to invest my time and money in this course. Absolutely clear and practical for parents.” Lammuansang Tombing
“Wow, I wish I had done this course before I had kids. My kids are teens now and I regret that I didn't have this knowledge and skills to raise my kids. This is super helpful and even though it seems too late for me, I still try to apply some of the concepts explained. Thank you!” Rosa Sam
“Incredible course! Highly recommend for parents AND teachers!” Yana Uvarova
“This course was so enlightening and well structured. I really liked all of the examples that were given. This really helped me apply the skill correctly as well as cement it in my knowledge. It was very helpful to be able to download the PDF's to go over again as many times as needed.
I know this will take me time to make these a habit but I already see improvement as I work to apply one thing at a time.” Chandee Herrera
“You have done a masterful job and your work will be a great blessing to thousands of parents." Dr. Dennis Deaton, Award-winning Author: Ownership Spirit and Co-founder of Quma Learning Systems
“Roger Allen takes a difficult subject that is close to our hearts, and in an engaging manner, inspires us to become better parents and grandparents." Hyrum Smith, Co-Founder FranklinCovey
“My absolute favorite 'go-to' parenting resource. Keri Krout,Mother of 7, parent coach, early childhood educator