Parenting: Helping Children with Frustration Certificate

This description focuses on what frustration is.

There are many reasons why a child becomes frustrated. Some of the reasons include: not getting what they want, not being understood or heard, difficulty solving a problem, conflicts with parents and others, confusing messages from caregivers, as well as many other reasons. It’s important to accept the feelings a child is experiencing and to understand that feelings of frustration are normal. It’s important for a child to express frustration and process it in a healthy and positive way. When a child does not express frustration, it may surface abruptly and intensely or the child may develop physical symptoms such as headaches and stomach aches.

When a caregiver responds to frustration, they can either help to maintain, decrease or increase the child’s frustration. The caregiver – child interaction is a “key” factor in helping a child manage frustration. Children need caregivers to model, guide and coach them through their frustration. Through this process, children will begin to develop coping skills and a greater tolerance for frustration. Frustration can be expressed in many ways such as tantrums, crying, hitting others, biting one’s self, screaming, destroying objects, pouting, withdrawing and other negative behaviours.

You may have heard of the “fight” or “flight” in reference to man’s early survival and response to danger. Early man would “fight” to defend himself or demonstrate “flight” by running from danger.

Hans Seyles’s Three Stages of the General Adaptive Syndrome

Your body consistently goes through three stages to regain stability and balance. They consist of the Alarm Stage, Resistance Stage and Exhaustion Stage. Below is a description of each of the stages:

1. Alarm Stage - the body’s first stress reaction to a danger as it prepares to deal with it by either the fight or flight response[CPJ1] . The body releases several hormones to provide instant energy. An example of a child experiencing this stage may be when a child is not allowed to go outside until he or she cleans up their toys. In response to not getting what the child immediately wants, the child experiences frustration and yells “no” and throws a toy. This is an example of a fight response.

2. Resistance Stage –the body resists and compensates to return to normal with the source of stress being possibly resolved. This restoring of balance is called homeostasis. An example of this stage might occur after the child above has gotten his or her frustration out and is beginning to calm down and returns to a state he or she was in before the frustration occurred.

3. Exhaustion Stage – This stage occurs when the stress or stressors continue beyond the body’s capacity, the resources become exhausted, the body’s ability to resist is lost because the adaptation energy supply is gone which is often seen as overload, burnout, adrenal fatigue, maladaption or dysfunction. The child becomes susceptible to disease and death. This stage may occur in a child who is repeatedly exposed to stressful situations (neglect, abuse, etc.) and become prone to illnesses or develops maladaptive behaviours.

Here is a parenting tip for you.

Welcome to the section.  This video introduces what this section is about.

This lecture discusses the importance of labelling feelings.

Strategies for labelling feelings is discussed in this lesson.

A caregiver tip is provided in the attachment.

This video introduces this section.

Coping skills are discussed in this leason.

This lesson discusses how coping skills can help manage frustration.

Positive and negative coping skills are discussed in this lesson.

A caregiver tip is provided in the attachment.

Implement coping strategies with their child and teach their child coping skills.

Key points about implementing coping skills are discussed in this lesson.

Key steps for teaching and  learning coping skills are discussed in this lesson.

Practical coping strategies are discussed in this lesson.

The importance of teaching children to use their words.

After the video, the learner will be able to implement the “What if Game”  with preschool children, to help them develop problem solving skills.

After the video, the learner will be able to implement breathing strategies for themselves and teach it to preschool children.

After the video, the learner will be able to implement the Bubble Push activity to help themselves relax and to teach it to preschool children.

· Squish playdough

Take out a container of playdough and begin to squeeze, knead and pound your anger and frustration into the play dough. Keep squeezing, pounding, kneading and pulling the dough apart until you feel the angry feelings go away. How did you feel after you squished play dough?

The Angry Picture activity is a great way to release  frustration and calm down.  Additional strategies are also included that appeal to some children.

· Problem Solving Steps.

1. Understand – What is the problem? How big is the problem?

2. Plan - What could you do? What else might work? What idea will you choose? What are the steps? What might happen? Will it make things better or worse?

3. Try it – Try out your idea.

4. Look Back – what happened? Was the problem solved? If not, what else can you do?

A Feelings Chart is a great way to learn about and communicate feelings.  The chart can be kept on the fridge for easy access.

A Frustration Box is a fun and effective way to create a kit of resources to release frustration energy and calm down.  Having children participate in creating it, is very effective.

Using positive words and remaining calm, helps children to calm down when they are frustrated.

This video discusses the benefit of using a feeling chart with children.

This video is a concluding summary of the course and it includes some follow up actions to take.

This attachment is a fridge chart of coping strategies that can be used with children.  Caregivers can help preschool children make their own chart as well.

This resource booklet is a caregiver learning guide for the course.  It can be printed out and used with the course.