
This course is about more practice. Here, I talk about my top 5 most sought after topic in a Family Constellation session.
But also the top traumas behind these topics.
FAMILY CONSTELLATIONS IS NOT:
a talk therapy
a therapy you reflect on the session you had and run it in your head over and over again
an intellectual process
traditional therapy
something you do over and over on the same subject
about complaining, blaming or judging and criticising others.
In this video, you are able to hear Sofia talk about abandonment which didn't physically happen, but instead it's the way she percieved how her parents treated her.
Then she talks about career and succes, then moves to have being stabbed in her back by her mother, talks about a property, about being a single mum to go into finances and talk about the father fooling her, wanting to recover her house ... and out of all her considerations, money is what is expressed most as a concern.
So you gotta ask the client if what you perceive as being the most important issue is what the client agrees to.
Sofia is very intellectual and has several degrees and abilities. So this is a pattern of someone who's too much in their head trying to analyse what's happening in their lives and trying to solve it by themselves. But it is quite difficult to do that and we can easily get anxious by the overwhelming amount of problems we put together. We are limited by our small consciousness and it is the unconscious what runs our lives.
HOW TO HELP YOUR CLIENT DEFINE AND FOCUS ON THEIR TOPIC
Clients love to tell their stories and get validated too.
They want and need people us to listen to them. But here is the catch... this is not what we do. We do not want them to keep talking about what's not working in their lives and blaming their parents, partners, family members and the world.
We want to get them out of the situation they are in and that's why they came to you in the first place, but they will resist that.
And we do that but asking
What do you want?
What do you want now?
What do you want today from this session?
What's the issue, problem?
Don't be scared of stopping them. When you have enough information, and usually we don't need much of it, you must stop. Do not get curious about their story. You will block the session if your curiosity gets in the way.
In the end, stories are just perspectives and you are looking for facts.
Money
Career
Success
Health Problems
Relationships
Death - Abortions, miscarriages, suicide, stillbirth
Abandonment
Divorce
Family Secrets
Violence
Summary and the essence of a family constellation session.
My client got in his father's place at the age of 7 and decided he was going to take care of the house and his little brother when he perceived father as absent. The father was working during the nights and sleeping during the days and he'd never really see him.
Roger is a complete artist. He's been a prolific model, dancer who has danced with many famous artists and modelled internationally for many years before becoming a full-time actor and producer of his own musicals.
He claimed that despite all that, success did not match his efforts and he was feeling demotivated.
WHAT'S THE TOPIC?
Lack of Success
WHAT DOES THE CLIENT WANT?
Success or more of it?
It doesn't matter. If he tells you no matter what his success don't match his success, it's not up to you to judge if what he conquered is already enough or not. It is causing a symptom and therapy is about helping the individual feels better.
Even though he might be a celebrity in your eyes, think he's already successful, be careful not to inflict your opinion because of your own perspective of what success is. The issue is relevant to the client and what they feel is missing in their life.
Your job is to find the link between the symptom and the root cause then show it to them - to bring awareness in their life.
"Success Has the Face of the Mother," said Bert Hellinger and that's where we begin the session from... his the mother and how the client feels about her.
TELL ME HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOUR MOTHER
Don't let them talk for too long. This is a brief narrative so you can feel how your client feels about their mother. Does he complain about her or the situation involving her? Or maybe he's in awe of her? Maybe he was abandoned, adopted, she died early or in a traumatic situation etc.
Keep in mind that there are many different traumas and problems in a family that might be affecting the client, but make sure you stay focused on their topic, why he came to you. You are not going to solve all his issues in one session. You should not even try, even when you see it show up.
What you can do is tell them there are other ramifications of the problem that should be looked into that might be cause difficulties in their life or in the future.
"She's distant, no matter what I do," he said.
Wow, isn't what he just said about his success?
Blind Love - is the basic survival instinct if a child who must belong to their family no matter what. It’s belonging even though I die.
My client is a painter who suffers with bipolar disorder. There are seven members of her family who are bipolar, but she got tired of it and decided to change.
Hong is a Vietnamese man who believed his physical appearance was not manly enough and it was stopping him from being happy and achieving his dreams.
Philippa is an elderly woman who had many health issues throughout her life.
It turned out there was someone responsible for that pushed away by her family.
"TOP 5 COMMON TOPICS IN FAMILY CONSTELLATIONS"
Unveil Healing Through Animated Case Studies
Dive into a captivating animated course, a compilation of the most prevalent topics and traumas drawn from my extensive practice, inspired by my book "Healing the Presence of the Past." These cases offer insights into symptoms stemming from family exclusions—when a member is cast aside, forgotten, or labeled as the "black sheep" for not conforming to family values.
These exclusions disrupt the family field, carrying imbalances that transcend generations, resulting in unconscious entanglements, health challenges, and life struggles. The healing power of reintegrating the excluded family member reverberates through the entire family system. As Rupert Sheldrake aptly describes it, the family field is like an invisible, unbreakable elastic band with built-in memory.
In this course, I present compelling case studies, guiding you from initial topic exploration to resolution. The visual format is designed to immerse you in these common struggles, fostering a deeper understanding.
Topics Covered:
Money
Career
Success
Health
Relationships
Case Studies:
"Where does my money go?"
"Man of the house at 7"
"Distant Mother"
"An Intruder in my health"
"I am tired of being bipolar"
"I'm too thin"
"The concentration camp is alive in my head"
Top Five Causes of Trauma:
Death
Abandonment
Divorce
Family Secrets
Violence
Each video lesson is complemented by a written explanatory segment.