
Develop assertiveness and likability by setting clear boundaries, asking for what you want, and delivering hard news; cultivate empathy, curiosity, vulnerability, and warm audience connections.
Diagnose your default and secondary styles across four quadrants to become more assertive and more likable: Radical Candor, ruinous empathy, manipulative insincerity, obnoxious aggression. Jot three situations to map style.
Define assertiveness as confident, respectful, non-threatening behavior that stands up for oneself. Contrast it with aggression and present assertiveness as a teachable life skill with five key behaviors to practice.
Learn to identify and enforce boundaries to communicate assertively, using the BIG framework—boundaries, integrity, generosity—to stay true to yourself while being generous with others.
Learn to deliver a clear no with assertiveness, own your message, map priorities with the plate exercise, and use a simple formula to manage expectations.
Develop assertiveness and likability through self-awareness; tell on yourself in real-time conversations to foster authenticity, honesty, and persuasive, empathetic communication.
Deliver hard feedback quickly by addressing it up front, grounding comments in observable behavior, and sharing the impact, then set a concrete next step to build trust.
Learn to interrupt skillfully to disrupt group norms and be seen as assertive in high-stakes meetings. Start by noticing dynamics, speaking up early, and pausing the action with I statements.
Develop assertiveness to build inclusive environments by centering the relationship in conversations, blending positive intention, future vision, and perspective-taking to empower all voices.
Define likability as qualities that draw favorable regard, and learn core skills: empathy, vulnerability, curiosity, acknowledgement, and trustworthiness, to balance assertiveness with warmth.
Develop empathy to boost likability by mastering perspective-taking. Practice three levels of listening—level one, level two, and level three—using open-ended questions and active listening to understand others.
Learn to incorporate vulnerability in communications by sharing personal stories to build authenticity, empathy, and trust, with steps to share failure stories and to reveal real time vulnerability.
Lean into curiosity by asking short, open-ended questions that start with what or how, to make others feel heard, boosting engagement, likability, and broader social connections.
Learn to give real-time, genuine acknowledgements that recognize both what someone does and who they are, boosting likability by highlighting observed strengths.
Learn to say the hard thing first to boost trust and likeability by delivering direct, concise feedback, talking straight, and avoiding fluff.
learn to balance assertiveness and likability in high-stakes, changing situations by navigating feedback bias, perceived bullying, and consequences, while avoiding people-pleasing and pushover tendencies.
Identify how people-pleasing creates a pushover, and use the Yale communication frame to articulate feelings and requests. Practice radical self-care to set boundaries, protect your needs, and avoid ruinous empathy.
Identify when assertiveness becomes bullying, featuring aggression, lack of empathy, and self-focused behavior, as described in the radical candor model, and mitigate by reading the room, asking questions, and self-assessment.
Develop a shared vocabulary for assertiveness and likability, using radical candor to define empathy, listening, boundaries, and feedback; set norms and regular check-ins to strengthen group dynamics and psychological safety.
Apply practical strategies to become more assertive and likable in daily life, practicing with others to develop a more impactful, caring, and direct presence.
In our world today, coming across as assertive and likable can often feel like an impossible paradox.
Maybe you often avoid conflict, finding yourself looking for solid tools to navigate tricky conversations. Maybe you struggle to set boundaries, say no, have courageous conversations and stand up for yourself with confidence. Or maybe you people experience you as aggressive, self-interested or bullying as you are failing to put the relationship at the center of your interactions.
Whatever your challenge, this user-friendly, engaging course will help you refine the skills you need to be an effective communicator in your life.
This course will help you to become more assertive while continuing to be likable in the face of personal and professional challenges with confidence and ease.
Welcome to How to be Assertive and Likable! In this course, I’ll provide lectures to help you drill in on the dimension you need to develop - fast, so that you can immediately apply it to your work or life. The videos in this course are standalone. That means you don’t have to watch in any particular order, though they build off each other over time. Each lecture is short and focused, so if you’re searching for a specific skill or topic that’s relevant for you, take a look through the tips to find the knowledge you need when you need it.
I created this practical Udemy course for you—filled with my unique insights from coaching leaders at Fortune 500 companies, nonprofits and government agencies around the world for over 10 years. This course is packed with the most practical, real world training that has been requested by my clients again and again, and it’s built specifically to demystify assertiveness and get you acting with more confidence and intentionality today.
This course is built specifically for any professional in any industry at any level who wants to get targeted, quick, practical help to respond with assertiveness and likability in a variety of situations.
Oh and did I mention that we laugh a lot in this course? Failure requires a sense of humor, and if we’re not having fun while we’re practicing, it’s not working.
In this course, we will cover:
Setting boundaries to overcoming old patterns of self-sabotage that get in the way of assertiveness
Asking for what you want and deliver clear nos
Getting more honest by practicing the skill of telling on yourself
Delivering hard feedback early and often – with confidence
How to interrupt skillfully to build more inclusivity
Incorporating vulnerability into your communications
Building trust by putting the relationship at the center and saying the hard thing
Empathy 101
Delivering acknowledgment and appreciation
Each section deepens your ability to train in being likable and assertive in a variety of situations.
In the first section, we’ll tackle the question of how to be more assertive: Key behaviors that will help you set clear boundaries, ask for what you want and deliver hard news -fast- in a variety of situations. The second section will help you cultivate likability by working on skills of empathy, curiosity, vulnerability and acknowledgement to come across as warm and likable with your audience. And finally, we’ll look at bringing these skills together and applying them with groups as well as the dangers of going too far in either direction.
All of these skills help you navigate tricky situations to assert yourself and come across as likable – all with energy and confidence.
So what are you waiting for? Jump in today to see how even one of these lectures can change your life, giving you a competitive edge to help you advance in your job and personal life. I’m thrilled to help guide you as you expand your skills and become more likable and assertive today.