My whole life, I felt like something wasn't quite right. It wasn't until I began examining how I had been programmed by my life experiences that things became clear, and I woke up from narcissistic and emotional abuse, spiritual abuse, and a number of other types of abuse that originate from an unconscious place when people are not aware of how they are taking their emotions out on other people. Never underestimate the power of denial, right?
(For example, you may have been in a relationship with an abusive person who was adamant about never "hitting a woman." Their words and behaviors don't align, meaning they are out of alignment with their souls and true beliefs and acting only from ego and subconscious programming; this can happen to all of us without us realizing it because we often fall into toxic behavior patterns when we are unaware and too proud to admit our faults.)
I created my first course (Defusing the Love Bomb) by documenting major revelations, mindfulness exercises, and inner work techniques that helped me heal myself after traditional therapy failed and I woke up to having been emotionally abused, manipulated, scapegoated, and infantilized my entire life. I had to fend for myself emotionally, and because self-healing from within can be an incredibly intense journey, I decided that I wouldn't wish that kind of loneliness or feeling of abandonment and betrayal on anyone, especially while spiritually awakening, so I decided that I would share some of my journey with those who resonate and have similar belief system (BS) programming to heal from.
This work has allowed me to heal an almost decade-long addiction to alcohol, lose 140 pounds, and heal my relationships with my children after having ignorantly and unconsciously passed on similar emotionally abusive behavior for years. I now am able to practice patience, compassion, non-judgment, and non-reactivity in each moment, and this has been especially challenging because my children and I have to rebuild our lives after losing almost everything, including our home, and dealing with several cancer-related deaths recently. I chose not to settle for abuse, and the abusers' response was to make us homeless when we no longer complied with their opinions of how we should live... go figure. Being ourselves was out of the question in that environment, for me as well as my children, and for highly intuitive and creative empaths, this suppression of emotions and creativity creates more problems than it solves.
This also led me to closely examine the differences between conditional love--the type of love we have been programmed to accept as "normal"--versus unconditional, soul-level love, which feels counter-intuitive at first because of programming that tells us conditions are a normal and acceptable part of love.
Love is freedom to be yourself because those who love you accept you; it isn't supposed to feel like a trap or a war zone in the home. Love isn't supposed to feel one-sided or like everyone has to walk around on eggshells to avoid pissing someone off. The ONLY time this happens is if someone flies into a rage on a regular basis and projects their emotional baggage and toxicity onto others; rather than taking responsibility for their own emotions, they try to control other people with their explosive outbursts, and this is a recipe for misery all around.
If this resonates with you, I invite you to check out my first consciousness expansion & emotional self-healing course, Defusing the Love Bomb: From Explosive to Unconditional. True happiness, love, and peace begin from within--if you would like to begin healing yourself from your experiential subconscious programming and choose your true beliefs from a place of alignment with your soul, then this course will help you on your journey on very deep and profound levels.
I look forward to seeing you in class. Let's thrive!