From Stage Fright to Loving the Spotlight

In this section we will be able to put labels on the underlying causes of stage fright. We will then apply a couple of simple mental exercises. First, we will induce negative emotions and put them into context. Second, we will frame the reason for our anxiety around the reason we are in the situation in the first place. We will begin the process of embracing our emotions, good and bad.

We will do a mental exercise that induces the same kind of anxiety that we feel when we are faced with the prospect of having to present to an audience. We will try to explain why we feel the way we feel by connecting the emotions to our instincts and evolution as a spieces.

Learn about Maslows Pyramid of Needs and how it can serve as a framework to understand why our bodies induce fight-or-flight reactions when we are actually not in a life-or-death situation.

Learn more about the underlying conditions that can cause stage fright.

In this lecture, we will document the conditions that you believe are the cause of your personal stage fright.

We explore how your own expectation of a bad performance is a heavy burden to carry around, similar to how it is hard to carry around a heavy rock. We will epxlore the idea of letting things go.

We discuss why you were put in a situation to have to perform in front of an audience and how the reasons why can actually be a comfort.

Our various conditions trigger negative emotions. We react to these in different ways, physically and by action (or behavior, rather). It is important to recognize destructive behaviors. By putting a label on them, you will be able to  quickly identify and pre-empt it before I engage in the behavior.

We learn why Avoidance is the most common of the destructive behaviors. We look at the different forms of Avoidance behaviors to better recognize when we engage in them.

We learn how Cynicism is often used as a way to avoid becoming "it" and have to present. A cynical person is difficult to work with and therefore not the first a manager would ask to help with a presentation.

We learn how sarcasm can get you off the hook but at a cost to you and your progress.

We often feel cornered when asked to do something that is uncomfortable. This induces a fight-or-flight reaction. Aggression is not physical in this context but rather, an aggressive response in order to deflect and avoid having to perform or present.

Lying is often done once we are delivering our presentation and getting questions that we don't have answers to. When resorting to lying, we mostly make matters worse.

Learn about 2 breathing techniques that will help you control heart rate, hyperventilation and body shakes.

Learn to accept blushing as a genuine part of who you are and the integrity you represent.

Learn practical ways to deal with sweaty arm pits, hands and forehead.

You will hear an experience that illustrates how we mistake our own focus for the focus of others. From this, you might be able to devise your own social experiments to prove that only you are focused on you.

The Emotional Manifesto is a statement that is easily memorized and reminds us about the reason we are being asked to present to others or speak publicly. 

We learn how to perform Sigh Breathing as a technique to calm us down before a performance.

We learn how to perform 4-7-8 Breathing as technique to calm down and get a good nights sleep.

After making it through a presentation successfully, you are getting questions from the audience. You might not have the answer or, worse, someone may dispute your findings. That short moment of relief after completing the presentation is now replaced with anxiety again. We learn how to respond in a constructive way that transpires confidence even when we don't have good answers.

Learn how to think about your content as a personal story. A story is easier to remember, more fun to tell and, more interesting to the audience.

We discuss the importance of practicing telling your story, what to do and what not to do. During practice, you will experience mistakes and practice how to recover from those without losing your sh**.

We will explore an exercise that induces your fears and anxiety in a safe space. You will practice how to calm down and how to embrace all your emotions, good as well as bad. You will practice good behaviors.

While you should not expect disaster (that is a heavy thing, remember), you should be prepared to handle situations when things go less than perfect. We review things that often go wrong and how you can have backup plans ready. In other words: You will learn to "roll with it!".

Knowing what you are walking into can help. We discuss what to do when you are able to physically visit the venue.

When possible, showing up early to the venue (meeting room, stage, your desk when you have a virtual meeting) allows you to get ready without being rushed. We discuss how you set the stage for yourself and your audience.

We discuss the importance of viewing the audience as your friends and how your welcoming demeanor will put them at ease.

You are now into your presentation and make mistakes. We discuss how to recover in an unapologetic fashion.

While uncommon, you will encounter detractors who will interfere with your performance. It won’t be as bad as someone heckling a stand-up comedian but it will be a distraction. Here we will apply the Confrontation Response Method that we covered earlier as it applies to dealing with detractors.

Just like we can use silence to manage confrontation, we can use it at any time during a presentation. Silence is not your enemy. If you feel that you need to pause to collect your thoughts, do so. We learn how to use silence to our advantage.

We learn how to approach an answer to questions we know. We also learn what to avoid as we begin to answer.

Learn a sincere way to respond to questions that you don't know. Done right, this will create respect with the audience. It is also an opportunity for further engagement with people that you want to get to know more.

Bring it all together into a few bullets.

We discuss options for those of you who wish to begin a coached journey towards loving the spotlight.