Challenging Childhood Behaviors: And what to do about them

Identify four common motivations behind challenging behavior and explain that children act to feel loved and accepted, not just be loved, and that adults must ensure they feel that.

Explore Adler's idea that behavior serves a purpose and Dreikurs' four motivations—attention, power, fairness or revenge, and fear of failure—plus democratic parenting with logical consequences.

Identify the attention-seeking child who interrupts, begs, or calls you at night. See how both positive and negative behaviors drive the cycle, and how nagging or scolding reinforces it.

Explore how children seek power by arguing, negotiating, or refusing, and how parental punishment or giving in fuels ongoing power struggles.

Explore how a child fixates on fairness, using threats like 'I hate you' and door slams, arguing over chores, and seeking revenge when promises feel unequal.

Identify how fear of failure makes a child claim they can't do things they can, like riding a bike, and how giving in erodes independence and confidence.

Children's challenging behaviors signal underlying needs and emotions, not malice; their developing brains limit regulation, so caregivers should listen and respond with empathy.

Explore how every behavior signals a need and how attention communicates belonging, showing children seek love through attention, whether positive or negative, and deserve acceptance even when not attended to.

Identify how a child who seeks power asserts belonging only when in charge, often triggering fights to flex control. Recognize that removing power signals that love and trust are gone.

Explore how a child uses behavior to seek belonging through fairness. Recognize how perceived unfairness triggers lashing out to restore balance.

A child with a fear of failure signals belonging only when they get it right, needing others to do it and avoiding trying for fear of not being loved.

Learn to meet underlying needs before, during, and after challenging behaviors, review the four motivations, and identify actions to take at each stage.

Meet a child's attention needs with 15 minutes of one-on-one time before they demand it; then ignore the behavior during inappropriate moments and acknowledge afterward.

Give the child power by offering simple choices to satisfy their need for independence, while you retain key decisions. After calm, explain that bedtime is not negotiable and choose battles.

Build a child's confidence to tackle hard tasks by recognizing effort and process, providing space to try, and encouraging persistence without doing it for them.

Complete the final quiz via the Google Forms link to receive credit for this hour, whether or not you are enrolled in the program.

Identify your child’s main needs and triggers, then apply consistent before, during, and after strategies to meet those needs, reduce attention demands, and help them trust themselves.